>>26709 She’s going to go through 3 boxes of wine, crying and masturbating? and fuck herself so hard and long her vibrator becomes DIAMONDS?

>>26731 >vibrator becomes DIAMONDS? Huh?

>>26732 auntie is a wurm and she clamps down like a hydraulic press

>>26733 Can wurm turns cock into diamond too?

>>26734 more research is needed

>>26731 The desperate kind of auntster is the best, followed by the cool wine one

>>26734 Yes, and she doesn't even need to touch it.

An excerpt from a letter to the Eros Headquarters, written by a cupid researching Earth culture. Dear Sisters of the Congregation: In this occasion i write you this urgent letter to report about a terrifying find i have made during my research. My inquiry about earth's cultural phenomenons has led me through many different topics, and this time it was something the earthlings call "Caucasian Woman Music". And to my surprise, there was a song dedicated to us. I wondered what praises and lovely words we would receive from the songstresses, but i was left speechless upon listening. SHE GAVE A SECOND CHANCE TO CUPID? I HAVEN'T MET THIS BITCH IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. Nor have any of my colleagues. Maybe you ARE stupid. I apologize for the language used, but the insults don't stop there. Even implying love doesn't exist gets my blood boiling, but even implying i could even miss my marks by a milometer is just an ad hominem i will not stand by. I did not finish my aim training with outstanding remarks for some random human to mock me like this. Is loving so good as they say? Just wait until i put an arrow through you. This is enemy PROPAGANDA, i tell you sisters. This song spread like wildfire, and the humans in this world listen to it uncritically. DIFAMATION, i call. Such infohazards are a danger to the Eros church, and need to be dealt with swiftly, less the humans reject our love. I will be sending a covert operations team to anyone involved in the production of it. Fifty arrows will rain, and then fifty more. Regards Lucretia the Irate

>>26669 >Seekest thou Oh no, she's a chuuni

Cupids should switch to firearms with special effect ammunition and hire us to form a friendly armed unit. We could all group up on an oil rig and call it the Lover Base or something

>>26736 Desperate and wealthy

Beware the Fair Folk.

>second day working at a monster-owned company >get a knock on the door while you're getting dressed in the morning >there's a freaking dragon outside >"Oh hey Anon, I was flying to the office and noticed your house was right along my route. Want a lift?" >tell her you're not ready yet >"I don't mind waiting." >kind of awkward, but it is a free dragon ride >invite her in and make extra coffee for her while you finish your morning routine >after breakfast you climb on her back and fly to work in just a few minutes >she lands on the roof and heads directly to the CEO's office >realize she owns the company >"Come pick you up at five, okay?"

>>26744 Sugar mama secured.

>>26744 Yeah, like that would ever happen...

>>26744 The most unbelievable part of this is a CEO with a healthy work life balance.

>Tell random monstergirl "You are the most gorgeous mamono i have ever seen. I'm glad to have witnessed such beauty in my last day in this world" >Disappear misteriously in front of her eyes Now i just wait.

>>26744 Did she mere' herself? Hot.

>>26750 It was bound to happen, she's just getting a head start and choosing whose meres here. Those CEO types are real go-gettim's.

>>26751 If she lets him fly on her back, she submitted to anon

>>26752 If she holds him in her hands then she's still in charge.

>>26752 That was supposed to be "who meres her." Not many unmarried monsters would give you a ride without an inevitable submission coming later on.

>>26753 Yes but he was on his back, lizard lost, human win by making more flying lizards >>26754 True but not many can, riding a snake (outside of bed) would be hard for example

>>26755 >not many can I was speaking to the ones that normally would offer rides (dragons, centaurs, that kind of thing) but since piggy back rides exist it's not even true that not many monsters could give you a ride. The majority can.

>>26758 Do you see yourself, a grown adult, being piggy back by a werecat?

>>26759 Yes, and it's hilarious. The incongruity is part of the fun that comes with the cartoon strength monsters have. A were at seems more like the type to (gingerly) drag you, but she is capable of carrying a grown man and if she chooses to there's no way you aren't getting husbando'd later.

>>26760 I would be too ashamed to get groceries like that.

>>26758 Putting a baph in a baby bjorn, but she's carrying you like a backpack

>>26744 I'm sorry but I'm more interested in the Troll lady in charge of the copying machine

>>26763 I imagine most of the time that sort of thing would be reserved for near emergencies if we're talking about a werecat, but it's also not hard to imagine talking a jinko into carrying you just because you felt lazy. **RIDE THE TIGER YOU CAN SEE HER STRIPES BUT SHE SMELLS SO CLEAN OH DON'T YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN**

>>26769 you gotta spoiler each line separately on this board or the spoiler gets borked

This thread has me thinking about Racing Wurms, complete with jockeys and racing outfits. I feel that wurms would be good racers. They’d take it seriously and have a lot of pride in themselves and their jockeys.

>>26770 I thought so but wanted to test. I can't be bothered to delete the post. >>26771 Why are you racing wurms aboveground? How would a jockey ride her underground? Either way, instead of whips you'd control her by dangling a gem on a string in front of her.

>>26773 Wurm racing would be like NASCAR racing—big, loud and outdoors! And the wurm and her jockey would work together to win the race! No silly dangling gems in front of her. Wurms are truly powered only by one thing—LOVE.

>>26769 Yes, I can easily imagine a man hunting on a jinko's back

>>26776 Man on a Jinko's back would just hinder her when it comes to close combat, but it can work if he uses a bow. Gun would be even better, but in that case it's worth taking precautions to protect her hearing.

>>26778 If I were on a Jinko's back I would have no weapons, so both hands can be free for FROM BEHIND CUDDLES.

>>26780 When not hunting, yeah, I'd need to decide whether I want to keep my hands on her chest or on her tummy.

>>26767 That's no troll! That's a JINKO! Also, she's not in charge of it, she's just not sure how it works.

>>26781 The Jinko FEARS the ear scritches.

>>26454 Not LN, but I just remembered the origin of a classic from another artist. https://warosu.org/jp/thread/32935120#p32941706

>>26767 That's the perfect tits-waist-thighs ratio for a pencil skirt

Would you let a monster girl get you Mpreg?

>>26788 The only thing a monster girl is ever gonna do is make me look like Ivo Robotnik, where you don't get Mpreg you just get the EGGMAN.

Suzumizu is the standard swim wear for all Sabbath members

>>26793 look at all those repurposed sahu scales

>>26778 Fully silenced + subsonic, something like the Russian AS val, at this point turn them into guerilla fighter going after order

>>26793 Is that AI? looks too plastic

>>26799 >looks too plastic Sad_Automaton_Noises.wav

I think every anon here should become one with their monster wives.