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/mge/ - Monster Girl Encyclopedia thread #66 Anonymous 04/05/2026 (Sun) 11:52:47 No. 84898
Welcome the Eastern Bunnies. Previous thread: >>83833 Monster Girl Wiki: https://www.mgewiki.moe/ Monster Girl Archive: https://mgearchive.neocities.org/ Content Aggregator: https://anubis.moe/ Writers list: https://mgearchive.neocities.org/writerlist.html Fanart Galleries: https://mgearchive.neocities.org/fanartgalleries.html Nextcloud Archive: https://st44244.ispot.cc/nextcloud/index.php/s/HYyFwJMp588a4tE
hot cross buns
>>84897 I mean if she can sqrt()
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RABBIT POSTING GO!
>>84901 She can only squirt if you make sure her squirting reservoir is filled. And it works a lot better with water in it than chunky peanut butter, ya big perv.
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HEBI EASTER ANONS
>>84839 >Pregnant children are gross Agreed, unironically. That's why it's a good thing monsters are almost impossible to knock up without intentionally trying for that result.
Boy I tell ya. Those monsters are crazy. All I asked for was a leg of lamb, instead I got a weresheep lap dance and intercrural.
I mean it they’re nuts. She said do I like hot crossed buns. I said yeah. I come back in the evening and the rabbit’s put tape over her nipples and strung herself up on an SM cross. Crazy I tells ya.
I tell ya I got this gargoyle rubbing her boulder tits all over my junk and then she rolls them back saying “he has risen “
It's been a while and i haven't seen FarHill's contest comm, maybe i missed it. Spinaceous' is in the making. Also to Magus: Yerb's is finished with your comm, he's waiting for your confirmation.
>>84909 I'm sure what FarHill wanted was a picture of a Leanan Sidhe with huge boobs. She uses them for titty typing, the most EROTIC form of typing.
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>Miss Human. What great big ears you have.
>>84911 >WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BRING UP MY INSECURITIES! >starts crying, you feel bad
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>>84912 >uh... w-what a great big heart you have?
>>84912 But I like girls with big ears. It makes me want to gently nibble them while whispering sweet nothings about making BBQ and doing THE SEX.
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>What great big cheeks you have
try to look up something from an old thread realize those oider threads are gone
>>84913 I am absolutely powerless to ANY woman who does this to me. Fortunately IRL no woman would ever, so I am safe. But could you IMAGINE? The sheer terror of a cute boog or beast or boogbeast just holding you down while you can do nothing to stop her?
>>84918 I wanna be the chew toy in that scenario. Just let me have it. I’ll enjoy it.
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So! It's spring. And uhh. Yeah. What now?
>>84887 It's a show of force, he has the right idea. Sadly, this means bad things for his window when she returns it signed, initialed, dated, and notarized (by her mom), but some things must be sacrificed for romance.
>>84920 Is this a bunny, it has bunny ears
>>84903 So then it does work with peanut butter? >>84914 Somewhere an elf just spontaneously orgasmed.
>TSA hounds pull anon aside when he's returning from his trip >he's nervous >they can smell he's nervous >"So... returning from vacation?" >"Y-yep." >"Packed all your souvenirs?" >"U-uh huh." >"Can you tell me exactly why you had 50 jars of peanut butter in your suitcase?" >nervous sweating intensifies >"I-I like peanut butter. I got some for souvenirs." >One of the hounds scribbles down 'Mr Anon likes peanut butter' >"If I didn't know any better. I'd say you were SMUGGLING peanut butter." >*gulp* >"N-no mam." >"Really? Are you sure? Do you know the legal limit on peanut butter you can carry duty free?" >"No mam. I only got two dozen there at most." >"49 Jars. You got 50. 50 jars. Exactly. I counted them. Are you calling me a liar?" >"J-just a clerical error, Mam." >*Paws slam on table* >"CLERICAL ERROR MY ASS. ANON. YOU'RE JUST LOOKING TO GET RAPED BY ONE OR MOR SECURITY HOUNDS AREN'T YOU?" >*anon breaks down in tears* >"IT'S TRUE! OH I ADMIT IT."
>>84925 >Flight getting delayed because of this kind of retards MGE can't be perfect
>>84925 Here's how you make this into a REAL horror movie: >All the TSA hounds are ALREADY MARRIED
>>84926 He's returning from a flight. He may be retarded but he's considerate. >>84927 Despair.
>>84927 >Get fined >Go home with too much peanut butter >Try not cry >Fail
>>84930 >>84929 Now you listen here. You can either sit at home, eating jar after jar of peanut butter until your tears smell of peanut butter and then a hound will come lick them off your face, or you can man and try the shipping port hounds instead.
>>84931 Why not seize initiative and ask out a single hellhound?
>>84932 Ugh. You don't know ANYTHING about romance.
>>84932 That could work. We need to get more hounds into work so anons can have sex with jobhounds like cophounds and guardhounds and tsahounds.
>>84931 That's the better way to go, really. It's more expensive, but if you rent a shipping container, fill it with soft lighting, soft blankets, beer and beef jerky, you can then get inside and "smuggle" yourself across the border. When x-rays or your container's suspiciously low weight causes an inspection you can be raped in comfort and elegance. You can even try soundproofing the thing, if you like.
Whatever, you fags are overthinking it. I'mma buy ONE big jar of peanut butter, slather myself in it nekkid, and run in the park. Also nekkid. I'll be married in 1 hour flat for like 10 bucks total.
>>84936 >I'll be married in 1 hour flat for like 10 bucks total. Marriage is cheap in MGC. Raising children not so much.
>>84937 See, this is why I voted for Miss Anubis. Her public works programs would've been great for jobs and salaries!
>When you somehow manage to survive your business trip across the portals unmarried only to get hounded at the return portal >definitely not profiling single earth humans
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>>84938 Dude just get lucky and win the lottery lmao how is the economy even real
>>84936 Enjoy your squirrel and/or poodle kobold.
They probably have smarter monsters working at the portal security, but I suppose dogs are supposed to be guards. Anubutts would make for great guards. >Sniffs forged passport >Growls
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>>84941 Don't tell the squirrels this, but I've been into them since I saw the lady squirrel ardently pursuing Arthur in Disney's the Sword in the Stone.
These hounds would never survive under harsh depresso conditions.
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We should think about how monsters can help us abroad instead of just harassing us. Wouldn't it be nice to have a therapy kobold walking around the airport you can pet if you're afraid to fly or need to de-stress after a 12 hour delay?
>>84946 Need therapy snek for snek cuddles
>>84944 Counterpoint: Burg. Counterpoint2: headpat. Counterpoint3: When the going gets ruff, the ruff get snuggling. >>84945 >Slips your passport back with a note with her number on it
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>>84946 you can please old women for money
>>84946 Air hostess monsters?
>>84949 How much do I have to spend?
>>84950 Imagine the variety a shog flight attendant could bring to bland airplane food! It's all shogloaf, but the taste and texture is different for every dish!
>>84951 a few conceptions ought to do
>>84946 >"Are you sure about this? You know it's a long distance flight." <"I'm built for long distance flying, I'm not built for spending sixteen hours in a small metal can."
>>84955 she says that but then stops every 15 minutes for "refueling"
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>Hey anon, do you know where the term gremlin originates from in your world? >No? >Well as we're about to board this flight let me tell you ALL about it
>>84949 That last one is doing things to me. >>84957 I'm going to hold her the whole flight so she can't make her way onto the wing or into the galley after midnight.
>>84955 >This time, Anon and Wyvern are stuck taking a plane because she's too full of babies to fly him halfway around the world right now >She's absolutely WHTIE KNUCKLING IT the whole time >No snark, no jokes, no snide remarks >Just a slightly worried Anon and his pregnant wife
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>>84949 I would do it for free
>>84959 <Do you know how unsafe these things are? <They fly higher than you can even breathe! >Yes, but-- <And they're powered by explosions! <The wings don't even move! >Anon spent his entire flight like this. He'd never admit it aloud, but he was glad to not need goggles or a heavy jacket this flight. Broody dragons are nothing to trifle with.
>>84956 mid-air refueling is possible, but getting leglocked at 600mph takes a lot of getting used to
How beeg/tall do dragons get in their human forms? Are wocks the largest?
>>84965 5'6", maybe
>>84965 >Are wocks the largest? There's no indication that an average wock is bigger or smaller than other dragons.
>>84967 You wouldn't guess it but it's actually dragon-newts
>>84965 wurms are the largest but it's not really a fair comparison
>>84969 You could argue ryus are longer. If you were to stretch a ryu and a wurm out as long as they can, I feel the ryu would go further. It takes more metric wurms to make 1 ryu.
>>84970 it's like reticulated pythons and anacondas pythons are longer but anacondas are thicker and heavier
>Collection of different dragons quickly descends into bickering over definition of large >Some using wingspan >Some using mass >Some using displacement >Some using cup size
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LONG WURM IS LONG
>>84972 only thing large about them is amount of time they've been single.
>>84974 >Dragon lifespan close to infinite >Human lifespan (without magic) 70 years >Anon's duration being single / Anonlifespan ~ 0.4-0.3 > Dragon's duration being single / infinity ~ 0 > 0 is smaller than 0.3 or 0.4 >Conclusion. Anon is larger time single than dragon
>>84975 and yet she omitted the amount of actual time she has been single. keep coping, lizard.
>>84976 It's but a blink of an eye in her great, great, great lifespan. She's actually been single for a smaller amount of time than her peers! Who needs to know the exact amount of time - who even keeps track of these things anyway. Anyway. Get perplexed, confounded and, dare I say, jested upon mere ape.
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https://imgbox.com/g/lZr37Fv2jf Wikifag here, this week's new additions add up to 21. This concludes the weekly report. New Images start here: https://imgbox.com/t6mfw1bm Search schedule is at the bottom: https://mgearchive.neocities.org/fanartgalleries.html
>>84978 Damn chesh got claws
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>>84978 Lovely bunny.
>>84920 >>84980 My expertise tells me these are not bunnies
>>84977 >who even keeps track of these things anyway. there are cave paintings predating the written language depicting her being single
>>84978 that first hellhound pic is peak
>>84982 Those cave paintings depict some other lizard. She should know - she was there when the apes painted it! Checkmate.
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>>84978 BITEY GIRLS = BEST GIRLS
>>84978 >Chesh pic When you ask cheshire to treat you like a chair
>>84978 >wet dog towel off before you catch a cold
>>84986 She's very cute, as is fitting for the cheshire.
>>84980 unlike hunting for easter eggs, shog eggs hunt for you
>>84986 2 am zoomies, to be expected of cat
>>84990 I'm manifesting the sleepshire cat. A sleepshire cat in her snooze phase. Giving sleep if you will. Snoremoding and hit-the-haymaxxing.
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You've been visited by dog.
>>84993 Is this a side quest?
>>84994 Yes, by completing it, you get your choice of soup, salad, or potato.
>>84978 This chesh is peak sexo, the need for to tame the chesh rise
>>84995 That's a stange reward, but who am I to judge
>>84995 if i dont turn in the quest, can i then keep the 'bold?
>>84997 You get entrées by doing the main quest. >>84998 Yes.
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Fortune favors the 'bold.
>>85000 Does she belong to the hidden village of the paw?
>>84996 No one who wants to TAME the Chesho deserves the Chesho.
>>85000 Kunai dog. CUTE.
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>>85002 it's more about the journey than the destination
I want to huff cat ass
>>85002 It's not about succeeding but the constant struggle for domination.
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>>85002 >>85006 Also I meant tame more as "punish"
Dynamic-equilibrium-dom with chesh, where both sides are constantly out to one up the other.
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>>85008 It makes adventuring fun and a nightmare/comedy for everyone around
>>85009 >The map says we must cross this somewhat narrow stream <You could probably jump it >Don't be ridiculous, it's at least 2 foot across <*BAWK BAWK BAWK*
I don't want to have such an adversarial relationship with any cat. I want a cat who is cuddly and likes being warm.
>>85011 30 adversarial 70 cuddles
>>85012 >Anon demands 70 cuddles per day >Chesho never gets her 30 adversarial due to extended cuddles time
Adversarial cuddles. Competitive spooning.
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>>85011 My favorite kot is very amicable and perfect for cuddles.
>>85016 The pauldrons stay on during snuggles?
>>85017 Even if they do, they don't get in the way too much.
>>85016 You must CLIMB the kot to get into ear scritching position. It's worth it.
>>85019 Or you can just ask her politely.
>>85020 But what if she get flustered and can't say anything. It's your job to scratch this fluffy ears
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Don't forget to love the Easter fox since she gave you so many freshly layed chocolate eggs
>>85022 >Easter fox Uh?
>>85020 Climbing a kot shows RESPECT.
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>>85025 Spiny Rabbit >>85026 Attack Rabbit
>>85026 So that's where the easter eggs come from.
>>85026 She set the laying in auto
>>85023 it's like the christmas snake. don't worry about it
>>85030 Tell me more about the Christmas Snake. I am a little worried about her just because snakes would be cold. Can I offer a Christmas Snake a slice of ham, some sides, and a hot cider? We could eat together maybe... by my fireplace. With a space heater turned on nearby.
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>>85031 she's like a snake except you let her into your house and give her 1 or more hardboiled eggs
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>>85032 TIL that this is a Christmas Snek.
>>84898 >you asked Easter bunnies >got Eastern bunnies >fucking chinks can't get the order right
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>>85034 I got your BUNs right here!
>>85032 >hardboiled eggs I hope she swallow it whole, that sounds hot. If I feed her all the eggs and she can't fit up the chimney again do I get to keep her? I won't mind the soot. >>85034 I won't say no to a rabbit in a China dress.
Sometimes, just before bed, I think about sleeping with mamono. SLEEPING with. >Have hellhound wife >Her eye flames don't go out when she's sleeping >And you need DARK to sleep >FULL DARK >Even worse, she crackles like a pair of woodwick candles when she's cuddling you >Makes sleeping almost impossible >Complain to waif >Fucked until unconscious thumbs_up.gif
>>85036 >Anon leaves dastardly trap out for Miss Christmas Snake >2 dozen hardboiled ostrich eggs, deviled >Watches furtively as she consumes them >He didn't poison them or anything >It's just, you know, a lot of eggs >Soon, the Christmas Snake is having a Christmas nap >Anon sneaks up and turns on the heat lamps he'd hidden in the room >Then curls up near her with a little bow on his head, and note To: Christmas Snake From: Anon
>>85038 I'd like to apologize to everyone who didn't get presents this year, but in about 16 years you'll be getting your stuff delivered at least twice as quickly.
What would Christmas Snake even deliver as presents? Just the usual Santa type stuff? Does she have elves who make them? I NEED MORE CHRISTMAS SNAKE LORE, DAMN IT!
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Anons, I wrote a bunch of creepypasta-style short legends about monster girls. Probably my first non-trollpasta work, you tell me what you think of it! https://archiveofourown.org/works/82572356
>>85040 Also eggs It's the egg cycle
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>>85034 You can't get the Easter bunnies, they are too stealthy, almost invisible
I should think that elves and dragons and other such races should have a form of separation anxiety. For in the long years of history, just like with vampires, though they don't count for turning their loved ones, one could imagine a chance relationship to fall between man and monster. We know that this has even been the case. And yet all of these tales, prior to the DL must have ended in the same way, the mortal span of a man wicking into nothing and leaving behind the deepest gulf of sorrow and pain. Now that love can fill that gulf of destiny, and such fears are no more, you'd think that there would still be a specter of that pain in these relationships. I wonder if elves have nightmares where they dream of you growing old and passing.
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>>85043 rabbit scary they'll drag you down to the breeding warrens
>>85037 I probably fantasize about snuggling monsters ten times more often than fucking them.
>>85042 >Portals open >Next Christmas, families all over the world are confused by all the eggs being left for them >Chicken eggs >Duck eggs >Caviar >Dinosaur eggs >Those pantyhose that came in containers shaped like eggs >Those little plastic Easter eggs filled with egg-shaped candies
>>85044 you forgot undead in general, death isnt the end to the loneliness, just more
>>85047 Monsters can solve world hunger with eggs and dairy
>>85044 an elf once cried for so hard and for so long after she noticed anon had a gray hair that she became a banshee
>>85048 I don't think that the undead would suffer from the same thing, because there's nothing stopping them from just making you undead with them. That's also why I didn't count vampires. Because they'll just make you one of them.
>>85047 How egg-citing
>>85044 Wait until they see how often we end our lives sooner rather than later
>>85053 eh but thats just human things
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>MGPD sending huge riot police units every time there's a large gathering of humans >absolutely kitted out like they're going to a war zone >"For public safety" >they don't even do anything except make cool poses and flex at the single guys Is this really the best use of our tax money?
>>85054 We do love dying for nothing
>>85041 >Years after Albert Einstein's formulation of the general relativity theory, the world saw Adolf Hitler rise to power. We all know which ethnicity has suffered the most from his actions. Yes, the same one Einstein's parents belonged to. >You know how the covid vaccines were said to be capable of altering the human genome? Not sure I want to keep reading about /pol/ shit personally. The idea of doing creepypasta about monster girls is fine, but this ain't it bro
>>85055 Take your pic >Public safety riot squads >Lining the pockets of Governmental foxes >Danuki slush funds >Futher militarization of MGPD "Break and Rape" squads used to dig out especially introverted Anons (they have tanks now)
>>85055 It would if I could flex too in state founded power armour to impress mamono citizen
>>85059 >power armour You know what they call a man in power armour? Canned meat.
>>85060 "Can opening" is a very popular category among certain monster media.
>>85061 >be frail, dainty elven maiden >purchase what the humans call a "canned soup" >zounds! the accursed container hath no lock or hinge! >seek assistance from the depository of all knowledge (the internets) <all "can opening" tutorials are just porn Such is life for dainty elven maidens in modern society
>>85060 Even when you're with and not against the mamonos?
>>84902 years to get each monster into a bunny suit >ushi-oni: century+ >medusa: 20-80 years >dullahan: 6 years >jabberwock: you met her in one >boggle: she is one
>>85060 Nah I'd win, I'd bap em with the ol antimatter sword and arrest them then allow my wife/squadmate to gingerly remove me from my shielding, teasing at every plug and port, like she was unwrapping a present, once we're back at HQ
>>85055 If human boyim were left to keep their hard earned taxes, they'd do nothing good with it! In fact, if they have less disposable income they'll be more likely to need a deem sugar momma in their lives. Its for the good of society really.
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Sally expected a duel from you But she's a duel monsters player
>>85068 Dude her cards are burning her deck is disappearing
>>85069 She's taking the duel very seriously
>>85070 Hope those weren't important cards...
>>85068 Oh yeah? Well I PLAY POT OF GREED
>>85069 >An undefeated Salamander challenges anon for a duel >She gets aroused and burns her whole deck >Loses >She demands anon to give her babys
>>85072 But what does it do?
>>85073 Raising the kids might be cheaper than buying a whole new deck sometimes
>Looks like you're going to the shadow realm, Anon.
>>85077 Is that what she calls the royal bedchamber when the curtains are drawn?
>>85078 give her a break anon, she only ever gets to play against anubis running competitive decks, they don't even let her use half her cards!
>>85075 Lady, that's not how this works.
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>>85080 Are you sure about that?
>>85077 Sounds like Apophis' kingdom. >>85081 That one is more like >Of course I have been your wife all along. Don't be ridiculous, husband.
>>85076 Unless they are raised to be next generation duelist
>anon after he loses a game of competitive snakes and ladders
>>85081 nurarihyon has been living inside your wall all this time Of course she's your wife
>>85084 This implies an alternative version where anon is peppered with kisses by some kind of ladder mamono if he wins.
>>85086 The ladder is also the apophis. I was thinking he peppers her with kisses, but that may take a long long long long long time given her long.
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>>85034 I don't mind eastern bunnies
>>85080 >dragon talking to a cupid after taking a dozen demon silver bullets to the chest >"I don't understand, I confessed my love to him and he immediately started shooting at me." >"'You belong to me now' isn't really a confession of love, or at least that isn't how most humans see it. I can give you a second chance but I can't make him fall in love with you. This time try being a little less forceful, ask him out for dinner or something." >"or... something?" >"I'll go get the instructional tapes."
Anon the dragon licker
>>85090 I resemble that remark
>>85091 Anon the Lragon dicker?
>>85090 Can't taste good
>>85064 Gazer-chan sees you ignoring her! Gazer-chan has feelings to, you know!
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>>85093 Salty licorice flavor
>>85095 Meh, I was hoping for something better from a malef
>>85096 blackberry flavor?
>>85097 Why would she taste like some old phone?
>>85093 Lick the part of the back between the wings. It’s a delicacy. Eating a dessert off a dragon is a grand dragonian tradition dating back at least 5 years.
>>85097 That's much better
>>85099 That wasn't a tradition, Anon. That was ONE wurm who confused a bakery with a "tiramisu mine." She didn't even HAVE wings.
>>85101 I’m sure it was a good time for everyone involved! That bakery has since seen increased customers and they’ve got a whole special menu where you can order things like the wurmymisu. I’ve seen at least one wock with a jelly on her tummy, a dragon with donuts on her horns and a wyvern with cake on her cake. Granted this was all at the one dragonian pervert cafe, but it’s a proud tradition nonetheless! Soon they’ll open sister branches in other monster cities!
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imagine the disappointment when they find out "enter the dragon" is not pornographic at all
>>85103 I think mamono are able to enjoy a good martial arts movie even if there aren't any dangling balls in it.
>>85034 Well where do you think most rabbits come from? And since China has introduced social credit they've been looking to emigrate from China under all pretenses, you know, they don't like it when the system takes away social credit points from them every time they do cowgirl instead of missionary or doggy. Rabbits are very privacy-conscious! So when you get one order on two Easter bunnies, someone's just bound to include a typo and send you two Eastern bunnies, allowing them to flee the totalitarian surveillance regime. Be more appreciative of them, they're just looking for a dignified life!
>>85104 Marital arts movies?!
>>85106 I would simply tell all these succs that I am monogamous AND terribly lonely, so this is too many succs.
>>85107 >monogamous AND terribly lonely Those are two issues that could be solved with one succ horde.
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>>85041 >>85057 Politics do make for a good creepypasta setting, since most of the horrors we know are actually man made and they are a lot scarier than some monster lurking in the forest or a couple ghost houses on the edge of civilization. The Albert Einstein reference and the mention of the church prosecuting astronomers was actually a good one, and the fact that our government is trying hard to convince us the supernatural does not exist only makes it look more plausible. If I would have been asked to provide the most unsettling monster, though, it'd be the ushi-oni. They're feral, aggressive, practically invincible, and above all they look monstrous enough, with their lower part being a horrid spider thing from Harry Potter movie.
>>85109 I recommend you leave the schizo /pol/ rants back where they belong. Just a small piece of advice.
>>85110 Anon, you're having a severe anaphylactic reaction. There's a difference between using politics as a scare factor, or even incorporating some references to it into a story, and going on full blown /pol/ rants. Don't overreact, because when people overreact, they often look like butthurt fags.
>>85109 >Politics do make for a good creepypasta setting Maybe if you're going for crappy gross-out horror. It's just the right kind of eye-rollingly familiar and banal.
>>85111 I'm not talking about the story, i'm talking about the spilling schizo rants in your posts.
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>>85041 >Why do you think did the church harass all those medieval astronomers >how the covid vaccines were said to be capable of altering the human genome >Adolf Hitler never really died >non-trollpasta Uh-huh, yeah, sure. Anon you should spend ALL of your online time in monster girl communities. Eros willing your /pol/brain will go into remission if you starve that cancer out.
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>>85114 >>Why do you think did the church harass all those medieval astronomers Galileo in particular was a cantankerous old cunt that would have been at home on Reddit if he was alive today.
>>85078 It's just what she calls her vagina. >>85115 My medication is maid cuddles, of course I'll take them. Dr. Horsepussy is so good at her job, my medication cleared everything right up!
>>85114 >Anon you should spend ALL of your online time in monster girl communities This but unironically. I'm much happier after I replaced all of my internet social activities with shitposting about monstrous women. Like, first thing I do when waking up is turning on PC and opening tabs with this board and thread and they stay open until I go to sleep.
>>85117 First thing I do is take caffeine for my headache. Second thing is post here. Third is shitpost on the MGE threads on /jp/. In any case I think this anon needs to be dropped in the Ushi pit for his safety and mental health.
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Cow neighbors are the best, fresh milk every single day and for free
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>>85120 I want to eat hebi neighbors mystery cookies
>>85121 Love nectar isn't weird, it's sweet and pure
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>>85120 When you move into a Hagville apartment complex you still get buckets of fresh milk every day, despite not having cows in the neighborhood
>>85120 What's the most polite way to let your cow neighbor know that you'd be happy to help milk her?
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>>85122 of course it's made out of love after all
>>85122 >sweet I think she has diabetes.
>>85126 Her heart only diabetes for you, so I guess she does. This is direct contrast to Ms. Lich whose heart doesn't diabete for anyone, but if it were to beat it would be for (you).
since i couldnt find the vampnonnete greentexts so that i can continue them ive been thinking of rewriting them some point in the coming days
>>85128 Don't do that. Write a proper story instead! No more greentext! Real prose awaits you!
>>85129 real prose i hard funny greentexts get to be short and epizodic
>>85130 God made you lose them for a reason. This is a sign to grow and evolve beyond your limitations. Will you make the Art Fairies proud? Or will you perish like a dog?
>>85131 >the threads seem to not have been archived(which is on me tbh) but now i must do the obligatory: >you dare? Kowtow a thausand times and i would leave your corpse intact?
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>>85132 Young Master! This document is empty! To contemplate the void one must first begin by filling it! Ai ya!
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>>85128 The only reference i can find to "vampnonnette" is on thread 53, but that leads to these other two posts(Thread 51 and 52). Using the spelling "vamp-nonnete" that you used in those other two posts gives me another one(Tread 54). Do tell me if there are any more.
>>85133 >No, i must cultivate and ponder the demon lords teachings >go ask the guy who lost most of his mana while training, maybe hed listen to your pratling >>85134 ABSOLUTELY GOATED, HOW DID YOU FIND THEM?
>>85135 I archive all of the threads as HTML. You just use grep(basic linux command) to search the HTML files as if they were text, and it spits out the file. From then i just open it in the browser and look for the post with ctrl+f.
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>>85136 Letters form words, words form sentences, sentences form magic
>>85136 that seems like an incredibly usefull information thank you for telling me that also thank you for your hardwork
>>85138 >hardwork It took like 3 minutes.
>>85139 i meant archiving all the threads
>>85140 When you've been long enough on the internet, you learn to archive anything and everything you care about. Wish we had an actual functioning archive though.
CAKE
>>85142 And then the Queen of Hearts said: "Let them eat cake." And then anon ate cake.
>>85123 I would like to imagine that whenever a bachelor moves into Hagville a shadow war breaks out between the new guy's neighbors to see which one of them gets to claim the new guy.
>>85144 Hag Ops: Cold War
do married couples stay in hagville or is it just for thirsty bachelorettes seems like a dangerous place to keep living in once you've tied the knot
>>85146 They move to autumnville on the other side of the island.
>>85143 but not only the cake of the queen but the cakes of all who were there the cake of Alices and the cake of the Cheshire Cat the Mad Hatters, the March Hares and Dormouses all at the same table the cake of Humpty dumpty was spongy and soft, but even softer was the cake of the Jubjub The Trumparts all took a turn having their cakes eaten the Jabberwocks cake was the hardest to eat as she squirmed while anon ate it The Wonderworms cake wasnt tasty at all and smelled of tobacco At the end anon was no longer hungry but no matter what more and more cake was coming his way at the end he died of diabetes/too much anilingus
>>85146 The latter, I think; I mean, I seriously doubt that you would be in any real danger as a married couple, it's just that being around so many unmarried hags is just really fucking depressing.
>>85149 Anon, sticking around means getting asked if it’s an Open Marriage or Harem situation. Like, pretty often.
>>85150 not particularly. if you're a marked man you don't get much hassle
>>85124 "whoa, these look heavy, do you need help carrying them?" and if she says yes then you're locked on the milking route and need to just follow the natural flow of conversation
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>>85153 It’s true! I wish to be garbed in silks and covered in perfumes while delirious on laudanum.
>>85154 why are you an alp
>>85153 correct women look good in them especially buff jacked ripped muscular tomboy mamonos
>>85155 Advanced trolling reasons
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>>85153 >Not a harem outfit in sight Boo. This does make me want to dress my sole wife in a harem outfit just to annoy cuck horses and make my PP hard though.
>>84920 It's time to pollenate.
>>85159 She is NOT sticking it in my tube
>>85160 C'mon, Anon. You're not committing to anything. She's just SOUNDING you out? tee-hee titter-titter sniggle
>>85135 >ABSOLUTELY GOATED
>>85153 I wouldn't mind a loli Nurarihyon and her friends who are also sensual lewd monster species in harem outfits
>>85153 >A harem of harem mamono in harem outfits Hell yeah
>>85030 i didn't know the christmas snake was allergic to walnuts and i fear the vengeance she will wreak upon my homestead this year
>>85165 Tell her you moved to my house.>>85165
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>>85115 Killdozer = Grem honeymoon fantasy activity Tesla deathray = again Grems or it's a sextoy for your Raiju waifu Suppressed pistols = OldHag upeads Kiki insists Mashtah should have his hands in her unddrwear drawers, not what she gas hidden in her other drawers >I had to google the LN Cleaner pic and now after JohnWick there is a real 'Kikimora' pistol - my homebrew BabaYagaKiki meme has gone full circle
>>85146 I can see a lot of ex-SadHags wanting to stay in Hagville and flaunt their new Husbando like a fashion handbag. Others are going to retire to the suburbs or a country farm to raise kids.
>>85169 plus who else are they going to play bridge with?
I like to think that hagville is like 60% married hags and their families (Very, very large families) and 39% unmarried hags. And 1% Anons who are in extreme danger of sudden marriage.
>>85171 Post YFW hag harem. Can you handle all the baked goods and comments on what a strapping young man (perfectly average) you are?
>>85172 I could never, ever have a harem. I have so much anxiety and so much self-loathing that I'd just panic and have a psychotic break. I'd be lucky to believe ONE woman could love me. Two or more? And navigating the interpersonal dynamics? Forget it. Never happen. That being said it'd be neat to have a wife to wake up to in the morning.
>>85172 Tfw peak cumfy Multiple competing cakes on the tea-trolley, and having to sample them all fairly. Order a burger, its going to arrive with exactly the right number of pickles on it or the manager is going to get beat up in the alley out back. Lots of long slow non-energetic sexx You want a 7course cordon-bleu, okay. You want nuggz and fries also okay.
>>85035 >bunyip shedding season >her scales come off with the fur like a ready-made rug >have to pawn off yipfur to neighbors since you already have blankets of the stuff >spent long hot showers and baths with your yip to make sure your house doesn't get covered in scalefur >your clothes are never safe though >never >all worth the feeling of running your fingers under her shed scales and feeling the pure virgin fluff underneath and setting it free and huffing it like a fresh rhubarb pie
>>85175 God it must be nice to give deeeeeep scritches to your wife.
>>85157 okay there bugs bunny
>>85171 >(Very, very large families) and 39% unmarried hags Every day every Hagville daughterfu has 3-4 Cool Wine Aunts teaching them cool things. Every night every Hagville Winebar has a crowd of sad "Goddess, they could have been our daughterfus" drunks.
>>85179 See, you wouldn't get me into one of those bars. But if there was a small town ice cream shop? Or a DINER? I'd be in SEVERE DANGER.
>>85180 > small town ice cream shop Be careful, they're just as dangerous. How many Cool HagAunts are going to be in there treating their 'neices' to sneaky icecreams their mamas don't see?
>>85182 Bunyip purring would send me straight to heaven
>>85182 >immobilized and engulfed in an unmatched quantity of fluff >the fluff begins to purr, sending deep vibrations into your body and stimulating your vagus nerve
Guys, manticores are NOT just teddy bears. They're NOT just beanbags. They're NOT just recliners. I tried to lay down on one and she just raped the fuck out of me and I don't think I'll ever be the same. RAPIST beanbag! RAPIST blanket! RAPIST teddy bear!
>>85186 Sounds like user error
>>85183 >bunyip kissing session >she's coiled your legs together and weighing you down against the bed >both of your arms starfished together with fingers interlocked >long lost your sense of the world, all is her fluff on your skin and the love on your lips >her blushing cheeks are like hot coals in front of your face >there's nowhere else in the world you'd rather be, but more than that, she's finally relaxed >completely in the moment, completely in you >then the crackling >is she broken? >is she hissing? >senses your apprehension and peels back >immediate bunyip kiss withdrawal hits you like a cold wind of winter >push forward and topple her >fluffy arms complete her full coil around your body >bunyip crackles erupt into deep-chested purrs that reverberate into you through her squished tits
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>>85186 Absolute nonsense, look at her
>>85189 Not only am I looking, I'm laughing.
>>85189 this is all mamono every single species, every single individual they're all like this. profiles are just HOW TOUGH ARE YA?! interviews
>>85189 MIDF in thread Guys it's a cum trap. Just when you think you're snuggling it out, it turns into the manta sutra, and you're being dryhumped into the bed and her tail.
>>85186 You just didn't get a subcore, sorry for you
>>85188 Crackles?
>>85185 Monsters are NOT allowed access to my nervous system. It's important.
>>85188 >>85185 Need. Need a lot
>>85197 you are destined for an unfortunate accidental bodyswap with a mindflayer
Fujoshi alp who shitposts on AO3
>>85196 The kind of purr from an old street cat.
>>85158 list of ms. genie's monstrous features >cute >great tits >beautiful clothes >lives in a lamp >ears are kinda pointy >gradient hair color >can end the world with a snap of her fingers >cums to having her butt rubbed
>>85181 MGC just sounds like Koriko from Kikis delivery service or other mid sized, comfy seaside ghibli town
>>85203 MGC is large mice dragging human-sized slices of pizza down the stairs, and stumbling into grimy bars with one lamp-lit poker table filled with scarred lizard mobsters smoking in stained tanktops
>>85200 >fujoshit alp checks out, its the only mg with the brain of a 3dpd faggot
MGC is a dystopian hellhole made of concrete, wageslaves and broken dreams. >>85203 That would be the countryside
Monster Girl City is like the city of Cynosure in Grimjack, a place where all realities meet and the genre of story and setting you find yourself in depends on which block of the city you enter
MGC is a hivecity with constant gang fights, sex and factory work
>>85209 okay but they have to be gimmick gangs like The Warriors
>>85210 For me, it's the The Bubblegum Bimbos: bunch of Eros mamono in pink jumpsuits who chew bubblegum
>>85210 They know men are weak a good theme.
>>85210 It's all gimmick gangs with silly outfits
>>85211 Beware when they're all out of gum.
Goons do make good wives. You can't buy loyalty like that. Unless you're hiring goons, that is.
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>>85216 Hired goons?
>>85216 >be aspiring villain anon >put up an ad about hiring goons for your crime syndicate >a bunch of jubjubs and raijus show up smelling weird and talking about porn >meanwhile, at the other side of MGC <"the hell are you lot talking about, I wanted to masturbate together for hours watching porn, not rob goddamn banks"
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>>85216 Yup. Kot bodyguard are rare but they love to snug... to protect and fight
>>85218 Villain Anon could try his luck with Raijus anyway, their electric powers got to be useful somehow. The latter Anon should have a much easier time with his plans.
>>85216 I will mever understand why children nowadays associate goons with masturbation
>>85221 It's just another way of saying "edging" with some idiotic discord /trash/ subculture added. I'm not a fan how the attitude towards porn got polarized so hard, nowadays it's either "gooning" your brains out in your "goon cave" or neo-puritan anitporn schizophrenia and blaming all your problems on porn.
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Snek still hibernates, dreaming of the hot summer sun
>>85223 It's already too hot, miss apo needs to chill this world forever
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>>85223 Wake up already, dumbass.
>>85225 Now why am I reading this in Attenborough's voice?
>>85226 Because it's based on a clip voiced by him. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQ4iJK8NAkY
>>85227 Makes sense.
>anon steps outside for a moment >a bright light from the sky >a heavenly choir >an angel descends <oh anon, (You) have been chosen by the goddess to defeat the (local) demon lord and restore peace to this land >she quickly points to your wife in the living room reading a book to your daughter <THERE SHE IS! GET HER!
>>85229 I guess I could tackle her and pin her down and tell the Angel that it's all taken care of
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>"An endotherm you say?" >*tongue flits suspiciously* >"Why don't you come in? I have plenty of um... stuff to show you."
>>85231 >Casually mention you miss being hugged >Miss Apophis starts to pant
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>>85232 >"I'm not panting I'm um... doing my tongue exercises." Anon is not leaving Miss Apophis' arctic abode for the next 3 months (it's a long winter). Thank goodness she has plenty of supplies from her mom (facilitated by anubis logistics) and entertainment (some of those moving pictures and game consoles from across the portals). It could stand to be a bit warmer, but the heating is powered by mana cages (which require SEX (GASP)). And when it gets really cold, she'll need to coil up with something (or someone) warm to share body heat - potentially naked!
>>85233 3 months is hardly a winter, winter lasts from November to March
>>85234 >It's 5/6 months trapped with apophis instead of 3 oh no?
>>85233 It sounds like this Apophis is in pain. She does not talk about BITING anywhere in there. She needs a snake dentist immediately.
>>85236 She made a lot of ice venom, she doesn't have anything left in her
>>85238 Ice venom. Frozen venom. Venom that can't be injected. That venom. Useless venom.
>>85239 No, it's a delicious treat during summer
>I-I millked so much venom out to freeze it in a shape of a love heart *sniff*
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>>85242 She's drawing a line in the air! Foul magics!
>>85240 eat it fast, venom freezes at -4f (-20c) so it'll melt even faster than water
>>85242 That's a really intense look, Demon eyes are too sexy.
Thank goodness there aren't any devious purple ladies with black sclera, dark hair, pointy ears and nice tits. And even if there is one, I highly, HIGHLY doubt there are two.
>>85247 I see a devious blue lady with black sclera, pointy ears and nice tits in the second picture. And cute tummy.
>>85238 But I wanted to be all fanged-up with bites and more bites and venom and cuddles. Also snex, but I don’t want to be crude around ROYALTY.
>>85248 I hope she purple when she blushes.
>>85229 >proceed to zap that angel bitch with my succubization spell shot
>>85250 Depends on what color demon blood is. If it’s red, sure. If it’s not? Prolly not.
What kind of mamono actually reside in Hagville? I hope it's not 'flayers. Or vampires. Or nachos. Dragons would be good, if they aren't against warm cuddles
>>85254 All the unwanted so...
>>85252 flesh is colored primarily by blood so it's presumably blue
>>85257 you aren't considering pigmentation from Monlanin
>>85257 It makes sense why (well-fed) Vampires are not pale like Wights.
>>85259 >”well-fed” >She just lives beneath a meat processing plant >Disgusting smelly vamp neet
>>85260 All vamp are disgusting to the core
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>>85261 Her blood-sucking and ability to strike fear into the hearts of men is admirable actually
>>85262 >POV: you are a cashier at fast food and forgot that this one stuttering pale guy asked for no pickles
>>85262 Every time I see a pointy ear like that, I can’t help but think of how good it would feel to lightly touch the tip of it, and the irritated flick of an ear I’ll cause. And her angry face when she realizes I am about to do it again to her other ear.
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>>85242 ms demon...
>>85265 Oh, god, that’s the GOOD stuff.
>>85265 >Pull pin >Throw self on top of grenade
>>85264 A core fantasising about doing this to human ears, except also beaning them and licking them.
>>85262 Those cores are cool even if not scary, I was talking about real blood suckers.
>>85270 Leeches?
>>85271 Yeah, fucking annoying disgusting abominations that ruin shroom hunting
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>>85261 bats are cute. donate blood today
>>85248 Show me a deem with a tummy like that and I'll sign the contract before the ink even has a chance to dry,
Black sclera mesugaki harem
black sclera same-agegroup monogamy
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>>85276 far too perverse
>>85268 Brave anon took one for the team and sacrificed his own bloodline
>>85278 <"Foolish human! You have succumbed to temptation and now the rest of your bloodline will be foxed!" >"Foolish fox, you married an idiot who wasn't going to have a bloodline and now the rest of your bloodline will have traces of me in it!" >This exchange happens before every act of coitus the two share for the sake of continuing their respective bloodlines.
dumbass foxes thought I even had a ghost of a chance with a human woman what an IDIOT
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>>85281 foxes get dumb when they're horny and these foxes are really dumb
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>>85273 Vampires from the undead branch of the Sabbath are the best, the other boring ass Vampires are the lamest kind of undead, they are so lame and boring that it's more enjoyable spending time with a braindead Zombie than with a Vampire in her castle
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>>85273 I'd rather feed fruitbats.
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The puny space heater can only do so much against the apophis' IMMENSE weight (she's not fat, but lamias are just volumous individuals)
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>>85283 >working in groceries mass delivery with my truck >have to deliver some merchandise to a Vampire lady in a nearby castle >she invites me in, pale lady with a voluptuous body and some rows of Zombie maids behind >she invites me for tea and cakes, since I had nothing since breakfast I accept her invitation >one of her Zombie maids serves me some tea and due to her clumsiness spills a bit on me >still she starts cleaning me and gets quite comfortable by my side like a pet >the Vampire lady keeps spouting stuff about her lineage, the castle and endless boring stuff >still I keep feeding the Zombie maid by my side and petting her head from time to time >when the whole cargo has been unloaded by the maids I take the one that was besides me home >I bathe her, dress her up and keep her as a livemaking companion, plus she makes the house chores >a couple of days later the Vampires comes to my home asking to give her Zombie back and she will stay with me instead >a lady of her immense lineage and bla bla bla >I choose the Zombie >the Vampire throws a tantrum because she can't get her maid back since I haven't allowed her to enter my home >the maid doesn't look like she wants to go back to the castle either >finally the Vampire lady goes back to her castle and promises to never hire my services again, at keast I got a maid
>>85285 It's really silly to try in the first place; Apopsicle isn't space, she needs a snake heater, not a space heater. Guess what you coincidentally happen to be?
>>85287 Lonely?
>>85286 Zombies are cute and all plus easy to adopt, but you're going to regret that decision when she turns into a nagging and bitter Wight
>>85288 Also full of sperm and maybe just a liiittle bit warm in those pants. She can fix all of those things.
>>85290 “Run for your life, Snek! Anon the spermamental will destroy you!”
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>>85287 My heat is not for the taking! I worked hard to generate that heat! Did a lot of eating, moving, thinking and metabolising to make that heat! My father never gave his heat to a snake, nor did my father's father, or my father's father's father. If a snake wants to my heat, well, I'd just DARE them to look me in the eyes, coil me up, bite me (if they got fangs) and take it from me!
>>85272 >claims to have a backbone >complains about leech sex anyway
I am Anon Ymous, and I'm here to ask you a question. Is a man not entitled to the warmth of his own body? 'No!' says the snek in her cave, 'It belongs to the reptiles.' 'No!' says the dead woman in her castle, 'It belongs to the dead.' 'No!' says the yeti in Moscow, 'It belongs to the lonely.' I rejected those answers; instead, I chose something different. I chose the impossible. I chose... Swelter, a city where the warm would not fear the cold, where the cozy would not be coiled by pretty snakes, Where the great would not be constrained by the small and questionably of age! And with the warmth of your body, Swelter can become your city as well.
>>85294 Thanks Heat Miser
>>85287 A retard cheese muncher?
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>>85294 Bring me Anon Ymous' nibbleable neck
my body heat, love, cum, scritching hands, pockets, whatever it is they want, are all open to the public for a very limited time (until one mamono finds me) and then shop is closed
>>85298 Whore(bad)
>>85293 btw medicinal leeches are a thing
I think grape's silver accessories, piercings and head dress are really neat. There, I said it.
>>85300 Medically necessary leach rape
>>85203 Yeah, I already got Yerb to do that gag.
>>85301 she does her best
>>85222 Purple Laughkot: Yeah this place has too many 'edgelords' >budum tiss!
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it's getting warmer still hebis just want to cling to their husband for extra warmth just a little bit longer
>>85301 Pain the butt when she goes through the metal detectors for a holiday, and snakes take up a lot more space in a line. And if she's single then, inevitably, it'll end up being Anon's job to run the hand detector ALL over her body only to find she 'accidentally' left a small piercing in, or worse, demand a cavity search. Damn snakes on those damn planes. >>85306 Hebis are almost as bad, because they will get jealous if anyone searches hubby, and won't tolerate not being filtered into the same lane as him.
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>>85308 I will free the purple cat and princess carry her home
>>85309 really? even with a head that small?
>>85310 She's a cat, they run on instinct and charisma so she doesn't need a big brain. Most cats rarely use theirs anyway.
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>>85307 >Hebis are almost as bad, because they will get jealous if anyone searches hubby, and won't tolerate not being filtered into the same lane as him. But that's the best part of hebis
>>85310 Is her head small, or is her body big?
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>>85312 Where are you jetting off to on holiday with hebi?
taking a vacation away from my hebi stalker
vacationing to the same place to anon because I know he's trying to get away from me which is fine but I can't just leave him by himself you know what if something happens to him I'll just watch from afar and he won't even know im there watching him sleep
Shiroshire
>>85310 Love will fix it later, same for her fat body that will get fit, it's more urgent to save her first
>>85303 That's from axem, not yerb.
>>85308 Lmao deserved.
hiding underneath my hebi stalker's floorboards because it's the last place she'd look
putting my phylacetry inside a hebi's dildo
>>85322 What?
>>85322 that's how you end up merged
>>85323 I say what what, in hebi's butt
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>>85322 t. Undead Alp
>>85326 Cute Alp, would mating press into submission
Best monsters to kabedon? I bet trolls and most vanilla succs would have cute reactions.
>>85329 obviously the sabbath they are short
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>>85329 Ogre because >1. Her brain will implode at how either incredibly brave or stupid I am >2. If I try to kabedon her I will likely end up pressing my hand into her tits or face into her tits
>>85329 I will kabedon the ogre that towers over me my face will be in her breasts
>6 seconds apart >about the exact same beeg monster >with the same idea great minds think alike (about ogre tits)?
>>85330 Too short. >Kabedon Sabbath monster >She slips under your arm without ducking Or >She limbos between your legs >>85332 >>85331 This, on the other hand, is no problem. The shock would help you get your first of two necessary victories against her if you wanted.
>>85329 Pyrows, Balrogs and Jabberwocks
>>85329 i would try with a bogey or abaddon
>>85334 >She limbos between your legs Sit on her face! let her bask in the disk sweat! >She slips under your arm without ducking >just pick her up and suplex that midget!
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>>85329 Alps
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>First day in MGC college >Find largest monster you can and pick a fight with her to assert dominance and so nobody fucks with you >Attempt kabedon on big green fuck-off ogre >Get faceful of green titties >She's blushing (and mad) >You're blushing (and mad in the other sort of way) wife and bodyguard acquired
>>85334 living the dream
>>85340 I hope she'd call you Boss.
>>85342 Of course >"Hey boss, can we stop to eat?" >"Hey boss! I don't like how she's looking at us. Want me to rough her up?" >"Hey boss, could you replace my bandages?" >"Hey boss, can I get anything for ya?" >"Hey boss, I bought you a coffee." >"...and I bought you a donut too. Just cause it was cheaper when bought with a coffee. No other reason." >"Hey boss... *cough* just wanted to say I love you." >"Hey. Boss. Can we have sex?" >"Just for five minutes, Boss. A quickie." >"Boss. C'mon!" >"...please?"
>>85329 Kikimora
>>85339 Imagine how awkward it is to kabedon your bro
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>>85345 Says the one doing 5 sets of mating press at the gym with his Alpbro every single day No rest days
>>85308 Need big Chesho. Big Chesho means big purrs. Also big cuddles.
>>85319 My bad. Apologies to both.
>>85346 >mating press at the gym Stop falling for it, that's not an exercise!
>>85349 It's great cardio and an excellent core workout.
>>85350 I need many pics of sweaty cores!
>>85351 You gonna lick that core?
>>85349 But there are special benches for it, they look like mattresses but I bet it's just a coincidence
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>>85330 Bully the nerd lolis. What's the worst that could happen?
>>85354 they could cry
>>85353 And I bet they are overpriced too Gym equipment is a scam
I think I'd physically harm a Cheshire if she said looksmaxxing to me.
i think i'd hug a cheshire
I want a monster that’s far bigger than me and stronger than me to hug me
>>85358 you fool, that's exactly what monsters want!
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>>85360 they have a point
>>85357 Look at this ragemaxxing berserkercel over here
>>85361 Well I hate hugging, so you can do that junk all ya want. Any monster touches me and I'll slap em!
Cheshires not just my guide in a physical sense, but now a spiritual sense. My goddesshire cat.
>>85359 She can do it. She WILL do it.
>>85365 We better give the wurm what she wants. Who knows what might happen if we don’t!
>>85366 She'll cry.
>>85367 >How wurm used ultimatums and became a Lady and part of the landed gentry in order territory
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>>85363 Anon, some mamono are into that...
>>85357 She can say whatever she wants as long as she is within EAR NIBBLING range.
>>85369 That's why you gotta PUNCH the creepy crawly ones!
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>>85371 1 lead arrow, coming up
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>>85329 Slimes >they lose their forms when you whisper sweet nothings to where ears should be
>>85372 venom tipped eros arrows
>>85372 >>85374 I can take a dumb arrow. It's all just a dumb scam anyways, I'm tough!
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>>85373 ms slime turning off battery-saver mode
Slimes unironically scare me. I don't think I would wanna be around one.
>>85363 >Well I hate hugging >Any monster touches me and I'll slap em You try that on a dark realm and you will be sentenced to mandated hugging sessions. You will learn to love hugs and learn to love mamono, or you will be petrified by your new gargoyle wife whilst she's giving you a big, warm hug.
>>85378 NTA, but can I have a gargoyle wife? I think they're cute.
>>85378 >Gargoyle gets a man that hates being touched or being given affection >Half the time doesn't even spend the day locked in a sexual act, more often than not spends the day locked in a cuddle session with husband Dangerous
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>>85377 amoeba (she loves you) it's a solid concept
>>85381 isn't it nonsolid by definition
>>85382 I award you 1 haku for your wisdom.
>>85382 non-newtonian if you must
For me it's metal slimes
>>85385 Heavy Metal or Death Metal?
>>85225 Damn, I'd love to watch a documentary on monstergirl habits. Now that I think about it, monstergirls would also love to watch documentaries on human habits.
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>>85387 >monster girl habits Me too, Anon. Me. Too.
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Fact: You WILL be raped Fact: It WILL be a cat Fact: The kittens WILL be adorable Fact: You WILL be happy
>>85389 Shows what you know. I would willingly accept sex from a cat. Even from a catgirl!
>>85387 The most watched and highly rated documentary on mamono television (MTV) is about male human public bathroom etiquette. The part about how many times guys have to shake after going to prevent dripping without looking like they're playing with it is the most replayed section.
>>85286 >she then tries to attack you and kidnap you while you're out on the streets >but then a meteor falls on her head and kills her
>>85383 I hope it'll be this easy to get a learncow wife when the Portals actually open.
>>85394 She can read all information about you simply by touching you. SHE'S A CHINESE SPY!
>>85395 >Marries me for life in exchange for my national secrets, being sure to keep me happy and entertained so I keep letting her touch me and learn my forbidden knowledge >The closest thing I have to forbidden knowledge is a cookie recipe, and that's just behind a paywall >I actually learn more Chinese secrets from her (my clothes have never been cleaner) Even the smart monsters get a little silly.
mamono are just not very smart at all
>>85396 That Time when a hakutaku married an American dude hoping to obtain national secrets, but he's just a beer loving gamer guy and 85% of his knowledge is videogame survival techniques. Also she forgot that information sharing is two-way, and now he knows that the Chinese Supreme Leader has a soft spot for Star Wars movies and she keeps her nuclear codes under her pillow
>>85397 I sure hope they're not. Smart women would see I'm a dense cloud of red flags masquerading as a human and insta-flee.
>>85397 A smart woman wouldn't get interested in me
>>85303 Needs pantsu shots
>>84994 >kobold quest 1 >objective: pet or feed kobold >reward: +2500 reputation with kobold >repeatable, rewards rep only up to friendly >kobold quest 2 >objective: wrestle or snuggle with kobold >reward: +4000 reputation with kobold >repeatable, rewards rep only up to bestfriend >kobold quest 3 >objective: take kobold somewhere outside with you >reward: +5500 reputation with kobold >repeatable, rewards rep only up to bonded >kobold quest 4 >kiss >reward: kobold kisses, +NaN reputation with kobold >repeatable >kobold quest 5 >adopt >reward: kobold >nonrepeatable
>>85403 I'm not sure if the Kobold faction is very powerful, but being able to enter their territory without getting barked at sounds like it'd be worth a little reputation farming
>>85403 Does you lose rep by petting cats?
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>>85405 Making cats and dogs befriend each other is a high level quest.
>>85406 Does kiki works for the conditions?
>>85405 That's one nice thing about kobolds. You don't really lose rep. Feed them once, they'll remember you forever. Feed someone else - that doesn't affect the time you fed them. If you go and fugg a cat, well. You still don't lose rep, you just can't get Bonded or get offered the kiss quest.
>>85408 What about offering black harpies fries?
>>85409 You don't really "make friends" with black harpies. They sorta have two settings. "I don't know you" and "Family". So it's less about rep and more about covenant, you're either in or you're out and once you're in there's no out. If a black harpy takes your fries, it means nothing to them. If she eats it out of your hand it also means nothing to her, because you're already hers and whats yours is hers and vise versa, she's basically feeding herself through you. You'll know if a black harpy ever thinks of you this way because suddenly your back yard will be full of her single relatives, and you'll probably get so much in free food and foraged shinies that you'll forget that at one point you were the one doing the feeding.
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I may have fail my befriend offering to the kot, how do I bounce back?
>>85411 Cats don't do that with their eyes. Their pupils go round when they want to murder something.
>>85412 Ah so is she chill?
>>85410 >get a hot girlfriend and a cool new extended family that brings you trinkets >having kids makes the family bring you more trinkets >kids grow up and bring you trinkets Birdonomics
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Bully the weak
>>85416 No, the winds shift easily and no strength protects against blades in the dark It is the duty of the strong to protect the meek and recieve their love in return
>>85416 Anon, are you autistic? That's NOT the face of a bullied person.
>>85329 >Anon sees a cute spood hanging out in the corner >Decides to kabedon her >She is too large >Anon settles for spreading his arms and legs as much as he reasonably can, then saying "I declare kabedon!" >Spood's jaw drops Winning.
>>85418 What does that face mean? >>85417 True but it's too hard
>>85420 It means Miss Bat Cat is having a very nice time. She is probably one of the many beastgirls who is an "ear slut"--getting off to her ears being manhandled by gentle (but firm) human boy hands.
I need the dorkiest core you have to sit on my face
>>85421 So I win
>>85340 >>85343 This is cute, I want art of this
>>85343 >Not immediately rutting her in a storage closet why are gay?
>>85426 >Small closet >So small you are ontop of each other >Face milimeters from her heaving sweaty green tits >Intimate, standing sex where you're both silencing each other's moans so nobody gets suspicious - you reaching up to cup her mouth while she smothers you in her boobs >Other hand preoccupied groping jiggly ogre butt >Transition to lotus position so you can actually reach her lips to kiss
>>85426 >open closet >bogey spills out this is why you're supposed to knock
>>85428 ogre family hijinx
>>85420 >too hard We do not do these things because they are easy but because they are hard If you quit out right as something gets hard how will you ever have snex with your wife?
>>85426 Because I have to teach my minion ogre-chan patience. We will do it for a long, long time on a big bed after the day is over. >>85428 And this is why. Not only are closets uncomfortable, they're often occupied by similarly impatient couples
I want to teach my Cheshire to be just THE WORST person. Just TERRIBLE.
>>85432 send her to gremlin school
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Small smug sweaty green shortstacks are my weakness
What's an extinct mamono you wish you could bring back?
>>85435 megalodon gyaru shork
>>85435 gyaru velociraptors
>>85435 Anomalocaris-chan the cambrian queen
>>85435 Gyarucera(tube)tops
>>85437 msgk also acceptable
>>85435 Tasmanian werewolf, and fuck it, she can be gyaru too.
>>85435 Disco gyarus
there's some troubling implications to all these gyarus going extinct. make sure to do your part with responsible breeding
>>85435 Sabertooth Gyarus
>>85443 It's more like the resurrection process is like in the Jurassic Park, except instead of frog they used Pyrow DNA.
>>85435 Gremlins. They died in a series of sexy explosions.
>>85435 Wooly Mamath
>>85438 WAKE ME UP INSIDE
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Mimics are outraged at how little man-eaters have to try to bait someone into their traps.
>>85445 Life totally, like, finds a way.
>>85448 >>85451 >Gyarusaur leaves folded panties in researcher's locker Clever girl.
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What are some good ideas?
>>85453 Asking a Holst about vegan options.
>>85453 Putting a fairy in that boat to do battle with the raiju (or kraken might be more appropriate)
>>85450 literally what is hard about emulating a pile of gold coins
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>>85453 Taking your Troll neighbor on a walk so she can bask in the freshly arrived Spring sunlight
>>85453 Selling honey on the black market
>>85453 Get a bunch of monkeys, dress them up and make them re-enact the civil war.
portals... onegai...
>>85456 Mostly getting the density right. The average creeping coin weighs over two thousand pounds.
>>85461 >Bri'ish creeping coin who gets offended when you say how many pounds she is
>>85457 I tend to forget that trolls have a tail but when I see it I want to pull it
Which cuisine in MGE would you be most interested in trying? Is there a special dish that your wife is (possibly unexpectedly) amazing at making?
>>85464 I've been a chili afficionado since my childhood so I'd be curious to explore that aspect of their culture. Send me into the jungles of the Ocelomeh and show me what they do with peppers
>>85464 Demonic desserts are probably decadent enough to trade your soul for. Best of the best ingredients and made with a keen eye for detail. Lescatie must have some very nice patisseries.
>>85453 >>85464 Chatting up the waitresses at local ethnic restaurants. >When the Latina lamia at the local Mexican restaurant finds out that chorizo is your weakness.
>>85465 They probably got some really rare peppers and spices you can only find deep in the jungle where few monsters can navigate. You also know the meat you're eating may have been hunted/reared by the same village and maybe even the same ocelo. >>85467 Speaking of chorizo, kikis can make some mean sausages too. It takes a lot for her dog instinct to not eat them on the spot.
>>85454 Is milk vegan if the cow willingly provides it for human consumption or is it strictly no animal products?
>>85467 >When the Ocelomeh finds out I'm into Brazilian Miku but doesn't understand the cultural and linguistic differences between Mexico and Brazil so the interaction just becomes awkward and confusing
>>85464 Seeing as so many monster girls are carnivores of some sort or another, I bet there's a lot of varieties of barbecue to try out. I'd also like to try out the various kinds of junk food they would produce.
>>85471 The barbecue would be good. I'd like to try a seafood bbq as well with some weird fish the nereids caught. I bet volcano realm bbq is good too. also >Brat claustro who eats way too much junk insists anon is the real junk food
I want to try food grilled by dragon breath.
>>85464 Zipangu because me like japan food but I also want to try dragonia cuisine because it's full of weird new things and Lescatie cuisine to see how french cuisine translates to MGE
>>85464 ms kiki's home cooking marune sabbath cookout shoggoth jelly
>>85464 I want to try undead city upper class fine dining, dragonian and zipangese the most.
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>Remember lasses, subscribe to pewpewcreampie
You can already experience the entirety of Zipangese cuisine by mixing one part dashi, one part soy sauce, one part mirin, and one part sesame oil in a bowl with a chunk of raw fish then taking a sip. Congratulations, you've just experienced the full range of flavors available to you in Zipangu. Dragonian cuisine, on the other hand, probably has so many spices and variety of meat that it'd take you a couple of weeks to get the majority of potential flavors.
>>85478 Both are vast lands with many isolated communities and regional specialties thanks to the mountains and rivers and isles.
>>85479 And all of that vast geography and arable land is dedicated to the production of nothing but soybean juice and rice, mmm-mmm! Send the inari after me, I don't give a fuck.
>>85480 I hope she feeds you kitsune karaage
>>85475 >marune sabbath cookout I have a strange and sudden desire for grilled corn. I wonder if it would pair well with goat milk butter... >>85480 You think you'd get inari with takes that shit? No, you get an oomukade. You can tell the world how shit Zipangu's flavors are once you're done eagerly tasting all of them out of her mouth.
>>85477 I can't believe that Kurovah only draws inflation now
>>85482 Hey, can I get an oomukade? I didn’t realize you were just handing them out. And I need mamono bites to live.
>>85483 Did he nuke his account?
>>85485 oh nvm his pixiv is still around
>>85484 I'm sorry, stinkypedes are only handed out ironically. Did you perhaps mean that you can't stand the thought of having your wife live in your walls? Maybe that you hate chitin, especially legs made out of it? Surely you'd never lose to some monster whose special ability is kissing, right?
>>85485 He changed his name and only draws inflation, giantess and other garbage https://x.com/10TonTea
>>85488 Sad but man's gotta eat, I guess pun not intended
>>85487 Me on the right, UNironically.
>>85488 How big are the S's that he draws? Are they the "cool S" kind?
>>85488 That guy is a resident from old /jp/, never knew that he took such path
>>85453 Annoying an automaton by calling her tits "tin cans".
The foolish man builds his house on the sand, and is raped by the river monsters like the wily sahuagin or the bothersome river succ. The wise man builds his house on the rock, and is raped by a harpy first and then the wily sahuagin and the bothersome river succ. The moral of the story is you shouldn’t build a house and should move in with the bothersome river succ instead.
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>>85483 occasionally there's something decent but it may just be the degenerates are the ones paying for comms
>>85495 <These are polyurethane milk tanks with ergonomic nozzles. <Not tin. Not cans.
>>85498 i feel a responsibility towards pigeons since we domesticated and then abandoned them. i will join them on their rock houses
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>>85502 I'm from a semi-rural area, and I think pigeons are just the cutest. BIG fan of them. People in cities don't appreciate what they've got.
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>>85488 Some are fine
>>85504 Definitely wouldn't classify that as "fine"
Loli Vampires are the only good Vampires
>>85506 i like the big ones. and the feral ones. and the big feral ones
>>85464 Mamono beast stroganoff with undead mushrooms and undead holst cream
>>85507 It's elegant for me
>>85506 I agree, vampires are the most boring undead out there but I don't mind impregnating a loli vampire or two
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>>85510 Pregnant lolipire erotic
every time this brand of species hate posting shows up I just assume it's "people who don't like monstergirls but just like lolis or incest are posting here for some reason" hours
>>85512 I like dragons, but sometimes I say mean things about them because I too am a bit tsun.
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I would never say anything mean about this dragon, though, because DAMN she is cute.
>>85512 >This brand I don't really think "species hate posting" is a general thing. No one's going around shitting on cheshires. It's just primarily one autist with a weird fixation on hating vampires. No one else really brings up how much they dislike X out of the blue like that.
>>85512 I like the undead but I don't think I would really cum inside a corpse
>>85516 >Monsters cannot get pregnant easily >Probably have to fill her with septillions of sperm to get 1 baby >A more fertile being could have, at that point, already had a septillion babies All monsters are genocidal cannibals (though not cannibalism since they're just eating human sperm)
>>85512 Incest is good
>>85519 Auntster-like typing detected.
I don't really care about monstergirls at all, I'm just here to post about insects
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>>85522 It's pretty weird he hasn't done a multi-arm girl yet.
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>>85523 who's he? because they sound like a coward
>>85523 Don't say things like that. You'll make an Abby sad :(
>>85524 Hory shet. I didn't even really notice. Did he go out of his way to make them hard to notice? >I'm supposed to notice the two arms literally RIGHT NEXT TO THE FAT THIGHS AND PUFFY PUSSY my bad I guess. well, he should do it again. Do it better.
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>>85526 He did 2 girls with 6 limbs IN A ROW. >Abaddon >Abaddon Folk Here is an Abaddon doing a Kabedon. Notice that the Anon is blushing, because who doesn't like attention from a cute bug?
>>85527 Lets be real abby was basically one release.
>>85528 Look, I'm just happy we got more bugs. I'm into bugs. Daffy too.
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>>85529 i'm into hugs with women who are armed and dangerous
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>>85524 Best insect for incest
>You can just kitbash your dollfu together into whatever you want truly underrated girls
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>>85532 They are not, you just missed the Rozen Maiden golden age of doll stuff
>>85532 Hmmmm ragdoll werecat
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>>85532 it'd be pretty swell if i had a ranni
>>85530 >multi-armed >no snake bottom This upsets the natural order.
>Why do they call it a garden when you gard in seeds fruit the plant but you gard out water eat the fruit?
>>85538 That looks like a cat(erpillar) that loves to eat
>First time at the Salad Bar? >Here, let me tell you which ones don't have saliva in them. >No problem. I'm Verte. >I mean, if you're curious, gimme a sip and I'll leave a little on the rim. >It's nothing like that. We're greenworms, not whiteworms. It's more like honey. Just oozier and tingly. You like honey, right? >I think it tastes even better because we eat the whole flower instead of stopping at the pollen. >I ate a whole thing of lavender this morning.
>>85540 Abhorrent creature, never got why people like them but it means less chance to encounter them
The bugs are much more scared of you than you are of them. Probably.
>>85541 your NPC dialogue is coming along really well, you're practically portal ready
>>85541 More greenworm lovers means more papillons eventually. I don't get the love either, but thanks for the butterflies, I guess.
>>85543 Portals will never happen.
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>>85545 I already have 1 and 2 in my Steam library.
>>85550 She wants your 'ick on her 'eck
>>85533 I don't think something being popular 20 years ago means it's not underrated today.
>>85464 Pour two pounds of ramen broth and spice mix into a slime and drink yourself silly. Do this at least 30 miles from a shoreline out of respect.
>>85544 No daughter of mine is self-papping.
>>85555 self-plapping is sin.
>>85540 Yeah well I betcha don't know which one's the olive fork
>>85560 ur mum is
>>85554 I'm going to drink the flow-kelps delicious broth and she cannot stop me
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>>85564 I heard of a guy who escaped from prison using miso soup to corrode the bars to his cell, can a Flow Kelp bust a guy from prison or can she just bust his nut?
>>85565 No one can stop the slappa
>>85568 I love that pic. That artist really put together a vibe for Flow Kelp that I love. Very aspirational. I'd be so thrilled if I could be that zen.
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>>85569 Would you slowly drift with your kelp, or would you haul her to the coast and pamper her with worldly goods?
>>85572 What is?
>>85573 >I'm going to skydive into a sacco's sack
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>>85509 Cute and elegant is good too
>>85570 >And you may ask yourself >How did I get here?
>>85506 >>85575 Elegant noble undead and cute lolis are the best. I love Vampires, Wights and Pharaohs. Phantoms can play too if they aren't too lazy to keep a lower body together.
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>Life is like a bubble! <Why? >cause... >cause... >um... >uh... >shoot >ok so there are bubbles, and sometimes they are big, like sometimes a life is big?
>>85569 It's not that hard to achieve https://litter.catbox.moe/7o46k9.jpg
>>85581 A pond may be a bit small for a kelp
>>85580 >like is like a bubble because... <bubbles go up and then they reach the top and they're gone, but new bubbles always come up Much philosophy about the impermanence of things
>>85583 You've earned yourself a slime friend
>>85582 Another Sabbath W
>>85571 Both, obviously. She deserves both.
>>85570 Flote gote.
You will never bath with your wife
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>>85589 Yeah, she fills up the whole tub.
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>Pawjobs in the onsen after a hard day at work
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>>85575 yeah
>>85591 Is that a very smol core grabbing a PENIS? Or a ver large core grabbing a cute boy’s entire head?
>>85593 I think it's a mid size 'core grabbing her incubus husband Benis
>>85593 he was trying to fist bump her but she misunderstood the motion as is the awkward nature of the 'core
>>85595 Fist bumping the 'core is a cool way to touch fluffy fluff
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>>85589 Life isn't fair.
>>85597 If I bathed with my wife, her boobs would be so clean. So, so clean. You got now idea how clean they would be. A lot clean. Bordering on the most clean.
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>>85597 >Not hot bath with kot gang
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>>85599 Jaguars like water same as tigers, but there's no tacocat bathing drawn yet.
>>85600 We must bath thousands of ocelomehs tonight for the water god
>>85555 >"You cant tell mwe what to do!" >Begins wrapping herself in her own spit Teenagers are so troublesome.
>Democracy? >Oh no, they got this all mixed up in the brochure >We are a DemoNcracy >Yeah realm ran by demon bureaucrats and judges where you have the right to remain snuggled >Anywho, since you’ve moved here, want a demon?
>>85604 If having a demon sit on your shoulders was good enough for Socrates, the wisest of all men, then should it not be good enough for me as well?
>>85605 >giving Demon wife piggyback rides
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>>85604 Managed demoncracy is the best, you can vote for any choice and the outcome is guaranteed to have your best interests at heart. Very, very close at heart.
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>>85589 I'm a 100% sure that it's going to end ip in sex or some kind of sexual activity anyways
>>85608 Demons are scarily competent. And if they can't do it, they have a connection that probably can. She knows the right people. The right anubises. Careful giving them too much control, though the outcome will still be good for you.
>>85589 ...And that's a good thing!
>>85608 Can I have a pony?
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>>85612 >Can I don't know. Can you? Are you capable of "having" a pony? Is this within the realm of possibility for you? How about asking if you "may" have a pony? Can you do that? You idiot. You twerp. You're hopeless. Utterly hopeless!
>>85613 Can I touch Haku's big, fat can until she's hopeless? Udderly hopeless?
>>85613 I’m telling Miss Deem you were mean to me!
>>85613 Language prescriptivists get rape corrected.
>>85616 Hey bby its me ur language prescriptionist
It's already too hot. I need cold werecat lich's lap to rest on
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>>85604 Okay, so we've got the Demo(n)cratic party right here, now, in USA. They do everything a normal demon would do - they try to seize total control of the nation's economy, they work towards having the citizenry under total control and dependence on the government, and above all they actively seek to disarm people. For their own good, of course. They closely work with the big corpos (which also function a lot like the demons) and their goal seems to be the same as with the demons, turning all American men into their property. So here is the question. WHERE IS MY FUCKING DEMON WIFE?!?!?!!
Deems are deems no matter the hue
>>85620 No fluff Weird useless tail Mini cringe bat wings No fluffy ears Weird skin A lot of useless paperwork Can be scam Will scam you
>>85621 Wing burrito Cute gropeable bulb Wing burrito again Molestable horns Fuck you Demon contracts specifically are sexy powerful magical documents "Oh no my wife is trying to scam me into kissing her!" "OH NO my wife scammed me into kissing her!!!!"
>>85608 Id take my chances with either the mootriarchy or the sandpounders buy no fucking demoncracy
Do demons have laser tits?
>>85626 no thats for the giant lizards only and or the gremlins
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>>85627 if your lizard has laser tits then you're not milking her often enough
>>85628 I HAVE MILKED THIS WOMAN THREE TIMES TODAY. She is IMPOSSIBLE to keep up with!
>>85629 Make cheese
>>85629 Just give up and start doing bicep curls with her tits at this point
Is claustro acid safe to drink? I want to put it in a cocktail.
>>85632 it's better on salads
>>85633 I’m always down to eat my greens.
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>>85634 Same
>>85621 >Weird skin Lies and slander, Demons have the sexiest skin color.
>>85636 The sexiest skin color is a terrifying iridescent nightmare that burns out your mind and soul with the merest glance.
teaching imps to say gamer words
>hag wonderlanders coming out with slurs last used a century ago
>cut up some garlic >all I can smell and taste is garlic >intense craving for garlic bread is this what vampires feel?
>>85616 It's all wright, eye no were two hyde aweigh sew miss Haku kant raep mee.
Getting shock therapy because I called raiju's butthole a bolt cutter
>>85641 It's not hard, you just need to squeeze through a hole her literal cow tits won't allow her to enter.
>>85641 As a minotaur subspecies, miss haku's brain just doesn't handle mazes.
>>85643 I really hope that more monster girls do stuff like that. I DESPERATELY need to be AGGRESSIVELY CORRECTED. >Arachne reacts to your "web SPINSTER" joke by wrapping you in webs and tossing her over your shoulder >Gremlin reacts to you calling her "Short Stuff" with hollowpoint demon silver ammo >Slap Miss Vamp on her ample rump; get bit to shit
>>85645 no, minos are good at maizes--they're real cornballs that way.
>>85646 Calling grem 'Short stuff' will result in her size swapping you so you are short and she is tall. She may go further. Your pelvis is dust.
>>85646 Hang on, those last two are compliments!
>>85648 I'm 5'3". She'll get like 3 inches taller. Big deal. >>85649 I'm not naturally very mean-spirited. I just need to be corrected, damn it!
Getting rape corrected by Marune because I tried to disguise my unfeasibly large testicles as a giant pumpkin and enter them in the vegetable growing competition.
>>85650 >Big deal You just keep digging yourself into a hole.
>>85652 Do you think I DON'T want to be messed with by a gremlin?
>>85653 Yeah, and I think you should egg her on to go further and more dangerous when using her lewd and sadistic inventions.
>>85654 I WILL, ANON. I WILL!
When anon gives gremlin lemons, she don’t make lemonade. Grem demands anon take the lemons back. SHE GET MAD! SHE DONT WANT YOUR DAMN LEMONS WHAT IS SHE SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THEM?! SHES GONNA BURN YOUR UNDERPANTS OFF - WITH THE LEMON.
>>85656 Man, now I kinda want lemonade.
Grem stole all my height and now I get to watch her solder and fix stuff from her cleavage breast pocket
>>85658 Some grems have cleavage.
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alchemical mishaps
>>85646 I'm not fucking with any arachne, they're creepy as hell. As for vampires I'm not approaching them with anything less than a flamethrower.
>>85662 What if Miss 'Rachne baked you some cookies?
>>85663 Alright, alright, if she would learn some Anthromorphosis Spells to hide this creepy spider ass then I might consider this. Vampires still belong in the incinerator though.
>>85664 What if Miss Vampire baked you a big pan of garlic bread?
>>85665 No. Incinerator.
>>85666 Wall chicken?
>>85667 Incinerator. I hate vampires.
>>85668 But Wall Chicken is a secret family recipe! It has been passed down for GENERATIONS! Even the Belmonts love it and they're incredibly salty little bitches about vamps... HEY, WAIT A MINUTE.... You wouldn't happen to be a nasty, no-good BELMONT, would you?
>>85669 Now I want to know who's that Belmont, sounds like an alright kind of a person.
>>85670 There's a bunch of them, and they're all jerks. Dhamp bait, the lot of them.
>>85671 >Dhamp bait Wait, that's me!
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>>85665 She can't eat but will ask for something nutritious in return
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>be vampire, snobby typical fucking bitch >dream of finding yourself your personal blood cattle >find a lone anon somewhere in the butt end of nowhere, think he's the perfect candidate >your face when you suddenly find out that guy is more than prepared for this and you find yourself at the wrong end of a flamethrower
I'm too tired to frame this well, but I would like a cute girl to make food with me.
Heh, vampires. Easiest mamono to deal with. Just sprinkle her with a water gun or scatter seeds on the ground. Really, even a child can dispose of a vampire.
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>>85676 She would like to cook something with ya.
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It's almost Friday! Auntsters are getting ready by preparing their best ingredients for a perfect hot meal and oiling up their bodies
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just raccoon things
>>85055 >hounds needing to be paid to wear state-of-the-art tacticool and herd humans while showing off for them Anon those are volunteers. You don't want to see the career SWAT hound. Yes, singular, there's only one.
>>85682 She was here first, she saw first hand what mad men and zealots can do to civils and sweared that it would never happen again under her watch
>>85661 That's just corruption, that is
>>85661 >Paw tattoo I'm noticing.
>>85683 the burger stand will never fall again
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This is your new kouhai anon Hope you treat her nicely
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Ocelomehs are scary, you should be spooked
>>85688 You got red on you
>>85689 Would you be courageous enough to clean her face?
>>85690 Cats always turn their faces away when I try to clean their eyes or noses. I imagine she'd be the same. >honey you've got red on you <so? >so let me clean you <no >come on, let me just... And she plays keepaway without moving the rest of her body. No explanation given. Just silent, lazy resistance.
>>85687 I was just hired, I'm not qualified to train... And she's better dressed than I am. Why is the security clearance on her ID nine levels higher than mine?
>>85691 Maybe if you stun her with a kiss... >lazy resistance Cool kot gang name
>>85688 she had too many tomatos...too much salsa...she holds her mouth closed so she doesn't blergh out the salsa...salsa salsa spicy...uwh
>>85694 My salsa gets all the girls to take off their underpants?
>>85137 she's been standing like this for six hours
>>85696 >local man staring at a Wurm, trying to work up courage to ask her out >meanwhile Wurm is processing information >processing... >processing... Go boop her on the nose to reboot
>>85697 boop boop boop boop boop boop drill mode
>>85696 MENACINGLY
>>85697 >anon is too shy to approach wurm >let alone touch the worm >he pens a note >"Dear Wurm, >I thought you looked nice in your sweater today. >You also had pretty hair. >I wanted to talk but you seemed busy. >If you would like to talk, I will be back here next week at the same time. >Signed, >Anon Fullname" >three days later, anon passes by >glass crunches underfoot >a tree is missing >the marshmallow cats are permanently squished and wobble as they walk >a flier nailed to a surviving tree catches his eye >"WILL ANON FULLNAME PLEASE MAKE HIMSELF KNOW TO ADMINISTRATION IMMEDIATELY THANKYOU"
>>85693 You wouldn't kiss a girl who has red on her face.
>>85701 Why not? It's either blood or jam
>>85680 My day today is too big. Even worse, my Saturday is going to be big too. I need a long aunster weekend. Can't we make up some kind of holiday? There's always some kind of holiday in MGC. Hold on, let me check. There we are. It's national gruyere week in the mice communities. We're mice now. I need to observe cheesecake. I mean cheese.
>Gamble at monster casino >Hope to run into massive debt so I can be sold to cute monster girl >Instead go on crazy win streak >Cash out winnings and purchase danuki casino manager >Walk out with small fluffy millionaire raccoon under my arm like she's a carnival prize
>>85704 The man who broke the bank at Monte Carlo
>Card count at Monster Carlo >Invisibled from table into a backroom by several onis and ogres in suits >Pelvis given a 'polite talking to' by beeg red/green hips >Carried out of casino via the back entrance by new wife cause you can't walk >But before she leaves, tucks cash bonus between her tits. >The bonus from her boss which is suspiciously similar to the winnings you would've had before you were interrupted >Take her out to a nice meal on the strip
>>85706 Is this good business?
>>85707 hmm maybe we shouldn't give incentives like oni tits or ogre ass for people to try and cheat. However.
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>>85706 What should I do to unlock the chesh ending?
>>85709 You had to take an item from a missable vendor on an alley you can't see unless you go to the extreme left of the screen in a zone with nothing else on that side of the screen. The items is a Novelty Key that you can use to unlock the secret safe behind the minibar. You already know what happens when you open that safe, don't you? You get a face full of...
>>85710 chesh's kisses? Can't I just boop her nose to go faster?
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>>85711 No it's chesh ass It's always chesh ass
>>85712 Sad, it was not the one for me.
>>85709 >Go to Monster Carlo >Find chesh at poker table >Buy her a drink >Not bad, but not her favourite >She buys you a drink >Strong but nice >Play some more hands (paws) with her >Chesh has got a pretty good poker face >Eventually start flirting with her >Asks you to put your hand on her ass >You put your 5 cards on her ass >She giggles uncontrollably, slightly drunk but impressed at your dumb joke >Offers to guide you to a secret room where the stakes are higher >Agree >She takes you to her hotel room, but you have to walk behind her so your drunk gaze can perv on her swaying suitclad ass >Get to her hotel room >It's strip poker. The stakes are your clothes. >>85710 Speedrun chesh butt strat
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You people don't respect the fearsome thing that is GAMBLING. There are few hells so endlessly deep as that one. But the sand at the bottom of hell is a magical sand, it can reverse your fortunes... zawa zawa ZAWA
>>85714 That requires a lot of charisma
>>85708 card counting is pure skill and math, not cheating.
>>85717 Tell that to the security onis. …they’d actually be interested to hear how you were doing it! You know, before one of them smothers you in sweaty oni tits.
>>85716 Have you tried spilling your spaghetti in front of the chesh
>>85719 What if she mogs me in front of everyone???
What if I just keep trying to pet the cheshire?
>>85721 She'll build up a static charge
>>85721 She can evade the next pet pet proc
>>85723 If she keeps evading, I will eventually get really sad. Does she have a way to beat me literally feeling dejected because a cat doesn't like me? Because I will.
>>85724 I can't answer anon, I would react just like you
>>85720 Chesh may be a moggy, but shes not mogging
Goddess of the Cheshires, Please bless me, your humble servant, with a cuddly Cheshire who is into heavy petting and cuddling and also extended petting time.
Goddess of the Hatters, Please bless me, your humble servant, with a polite hatter who is into lap pillows, spooning and also extended tea times.
>>85728 >Goddess of the hatters >It's just a really, really big hat
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>>85727 Dear Goddess of the Cheshires, Please bless me too with the same type of chesho
>>85729 >"THE GODDESS OF THE HATTERS IS DISPLEASED BY YOUR ACTIONS ANON. YOU MUST BRING FIFTY COOKIES AS PENANCE." <? <Reach over and, to the gasp of the gathered hatters, lift up the large hat <There is a fairy underneath >"P-PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE FAIRY BENEATH THE HAT"
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>Anon is into tall hatters >Hatter hears of this >Chesh takes him to a private show >"So... I hear you're into BIG hats." >Anon nods expectantly >Lights dim >Chesh starts playing sexy music >"Introducing..." >Hatter walks out with a carmen sandiego fedora
>>85731 Oh, no! Cute but demanding fairies! My ONE WEAKNESS!
>>85719 she started eating it off the floor
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>Ebony and ivory >Live together in perfect harmony >Cheshory and Houndery >They rape anon together, why shouldn't they?
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It's Friday and aunties know it, do your best at work today anon and you will have a wonderful weekend together
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fat fox friday
>>85738 You can just say “Fox Friday.” All foxes are hugely fat due their diets of fried tofu and sadness.
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>>85738 Fox auntsters are also on the prowl
I caught the flu, send a nurse. No, not the cat nurse. A qualified one. Like a Unicorn, or one of those swamp goblins that make the bad juju go away
>>85742 Auntie please stop, I didn't ask for a milkshake
>>85746 Anon, that’s gonna be BUTTER.
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Why are auntsters so eager to feed you their milk?
>>85748 Because it goes to waste if you consume it
>>85748 Too fat
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>>85749 Either you’re missing a “don’t” in there or you think all Auntsters love drinking your pee.
>>85748 it's the only thing auntsters have to offer, she lives in an apartment and barely makes enough on her office job to afford groceries you know, it would really save you both a big sum to live together, you know?
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Jabberwocks are essentially flying dumpsters.
>>85718 Hfw Anon tries explaining his card-counting method in the "one, a couple, lots'n'lots, big-heaps" numbering system. >convinced she's scored a High-level Magic-User, Oni grabs her prize and jumps out through the nearest wall and runs
>>85754 More like flying dump trucks, if we take their asses into account. Man, imagine how much cooler the world would be if the garbage trucks flew...
>>85756 >Oni who is constantly gushing about how smart you are and singing your praises
>>85754 >Jabberwocks are essentially flying *cum-dumpsters *my cum ofc
>>85754 Jabberwock foot claws erotic
>>85688 NOT a Taco-cat story, but kinda related >be Anon >walking thru MGC streets >starts noticing he's being followed by a Cait Sith >Anon not interested, keeps walking >keeps following, always creeping closer >goes into shops, still follows >goes into Inn, following closer >door with obvious 'Anon-figure' sign, safety >goes in, into stall, locks door >Cait still climbs in under the door anyway >like all annoying Caits starts clawing at the roll of paper >"stop that, I need that" >"what for?" >"for wiping my ass.... why? don't you use...?" >> [image similar to .jpg just different color] >"GetthefuckawayfromMe!" . And that is one of the many reasons Cait-town is full of sad mamonos.
>>85761 Ocelomehs can swim and clean themselves in the river.
>>85762 Bath time with big cats: >Comfy >Romantic >Sexy >Excellent bonding experience >Smells good Bath time with house cats: >Part game of hide and seek, part wrestling contest >Stressful for all parties involved We messed up when we domesticated cats.
>>85763 Meow
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>>85748 Why not? They have plenty to give
>>85752 I'm pretty sure it's both
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https://imgbox.com/g/lZr37Fv2jf Wikifag here, this week's new additions add up to 25. This concludes the weekly report. New Images start here: https://imgbox.com/Gp5M9Tnj Search schedule is at the bottom: https://mgearchive.neocities.org/fanartgalleries.htm
>>85768 Cute Candle
>>85768 Help, help! An easily avoidable, sluggish snake is slowly approaching me!
>>85768 >grape tries to approach like this >boobs in the way >silver digging into her tits and other bits >rolls over and starts bawling
>>85770 plot twist: you're already paralyzed from an earlier bite and she's just drawing it out for fun
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>>85768 Hex Maniac monsters are so good, I would love a Zombie hex that would eventually turn into a nerdy Wight
I'm going to be a montoxicologist! I'm going to document and take samples of all the various venoms, poisons, toxins and other chemicals monsters make.
>>85773 And they sing >I'm a Hex Girl >And I'm gonna put a spell on you!
>>85772 Second plot twist: she also bit herself earlier by accident and is struggling to get you coiled before she can't move. One way or another you'll be there for a while.
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>>85773 I prefer a Troll with that somber atmosphere and that smile, God I would love her so much, we would have like 30 children all of us living in our own dairy farm
>>85768 Smug hellhound bride
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>>85778 Smug hellhounds. What do a dog gotta be smug about?
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>>85778 Doesn't really look smug to me.
>>85781 Somebody give this hellhound some PAWS
>>85768 The manticore monsterization image looks wrong, it's two pictures that don't even combine properly and the bottom part is missing.
The chances of a chesh, hellhound and manticore all being in the same room is so low that I can safely wear my core bait underpants, houndbait shoes and cheshbait shirt with zero worry.
>>85778 Small hellhound bride
>>85781 The smugness is pretty subtle, but there's some.
>>85781 you can only have so much smugness with those tiny paws
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large paws large ears large tits large legs large paws large smile large paws large eyeflames large paws *sips* ahhhhh
>>85788 big beans
>>85781 She's getting carried through the door, no matter how smug.
>>85731 >get the cookies >place them before the hat >beg forgiveness and leave >peep around the corner >hat creeps forward, tips up, and closes on a cookie >... >scuttles and engulfs one more cookie >... >hat starts snoring
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>>85785 Small hellhound is girlfriend, not bride yet
>>85792 you should get married to smallhound really quickly and then resume your budding relationship like it never happened, you're just that naturally drawn to each other and make a cute bf/gf couple
>>85791 The hat god is pleased. Leave her be. She must ruminate.
4 score and kiki more
>>85795 A mouse divided cannot stand.
I can't believe Anonbreham Singlecoln was molested by Jane Milks Boobs.
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>>85797 <Jeffrey-chan makes the best parties!
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I was walking home in the middle of the night and then I was stopped by this woman, she told me "Now you're my husband!" and I say "No" and she says "Why?" and I say "What makes you think you just can grab a random man and proclaim him your husband?" and she says "Because I say so, now do follow me or do I have to wrap you up?" I gave her the finger and moved on, but then she summoned a zombie army and they started chasing me! I've barely managed to reach my home, she keeps screaming at me that if I don't come out she tells everybody that I'm a COMMUNIST ANARCHIST FAGGOT, also those zombies are crowded near my front door and I think they aren't leaving any time soom. What should I do?
>>85797 god I hope my wife's last name is boobs so I can take it
>monsters with completely mundane names
>>85800 >tells everybody that I'm a COMMUNIST ANARCHIST FAGGOT In my neck of the woods that would just summon an army of people to support me. Realistically, I'd just cry out "help, help, I'm being oppressed and wait for a dhampir or jinko or something to come tip their hat and rescue me.
>>85802 >Gargoyle >Has no surname >Who gives a surname to a statue >She's just Bella
>>85804 >Who gives a surname to a statue Her husband.
>>85803 I'd like an anarchist dhampir, but on the other side of economic spectrum. I'm the "Independence through private ownership of means of production" kind of guy, not in the least because my balls count as the means of production (of semen)
>>85804 I've heard Russia is full of statues of Lenin and other commies, what do you think will they monsterize into?
>>85806 Dhampir's on the spectrum alright...
>>85808 Yeah, the spectrum of CRIMSON NIGHT VENGEANCE OBLIVIONESS
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>>85792 Monster chikdren are perfectly fine and educated to be brides, keep a working household and give birth to your daughters
>>85777 Don't post unrelated pictures
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<"What's a name?" >"Well it's how we tell people who we are, like my name is Anon so if I'm talking to another human I'll be like "Hi I'm Anon" and then next time he sees me he'll be like 'Hey it's Anon'. Do you have something like that with other sandworms?" <"Oh yeah it's like this" >she thumps her tail on the ground a few times and starts doing a strange dance with her outer shell >"I'm not gonna be able to say that. Is it okay if I call you... I dunno, like Mary or something?" <"Yeah that's fine"
>>85811 Well she kinda counts as a Banshee or a black Mage
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>>85811 And now?
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>>85811 >>85814 With a flower to make her more Troll like, flowers are hard to draw with your fingers
>>85812 >anon gets stranded in the desert even though he thought he was too smart for that >HELLO >WORM LADY >shit it's hot >mouth so dry >CAN YOU HEAR ME >if only anon learned the dance for his special worm >anon thought she could hear him through the ground >anon must be rescued by buzzard harpies that root through his stuff for payment and nip him when he gets crabby
>>85810 Not false, but a lot of them might have some kind of schooling or training to complete, and as perverted this is to say in this context childhood/youth activities to enjoy. In most cases it's probably still better to have a nice romance and stay as lovers for a good while.
>>85791 What, I love hats now!?
you ever think about how scary it'd be to be randomly isekaid into the middle of nowhere in MGE with none of your stuff, your phone don't work (if you even have it), no idea what the fuck happened. And then some monster girl happens upon you and you don't know what she's saying and she's got weird monster parts and possibly more than two legs. All I'm saying is that the fluffiest monsters should be the first ones to tend to the isekaid humans.
>>85768 DRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILL HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIR!
>>85814 >>85815 That tail looks more like a lion's
>>85821 The troll is a natural lion. But for ANONS.
>>85819 >get snatched into another world >it's full of sexy ladies >you get a creepy centipede-thing lusting after you
>>85820 I like this one. She has great hair and is absolutely splendid in form and shape. I want to make her smile!
>>85777 >brown hex maniac with freckles Yes
>>85825 Drills are top tier hair
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>>85826 Redhead with freckles is fine too
>>85829 Triangles are top tier teeth.
>>85819 perhaps it is the ushi who will be scared when she sees anon full-sprinting at her yelling a marriage proposal in a language she can't understand
>>85828 never has there been such a wellspring, and great knowledge that has been professed
>>85832 A scared Ushi - a cornered Ushi - is the most danfeorus form of Ushi. She may deploy her skittish MOO.
>>85819 Ever consider that we might scare the mamono? not because they won't consider us tasty morsels to bed and wed but rather our lack of isekai world magic/qi (note that this wouldn't be essence but some other magic system. Of course we have essence its stored in the balls!). I imagine that the hunting mamono can sniff the magical presence of a male out, so imagine the surprise when I "sneak" into their village and grab myself the biggest fattest porc to have as my wife! They would be horny and scared!
>>85834 the threat posture often demonstrated in tarantulas is uniquely vulnerable to a human walking up and tipping them over (onto a bed for purposes of romance)
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>>85832 >>85834 >>85837 I live in hope that I can protect Miss Ushi someday. Even once.
>>85819 Yeah I do, I will die of an gearth attack if I don't meet a kot (bat cat included, they are very unique to mge)
>>85839 Hearth*
>>85840 >Anon lives in fear of fireplaces >Heard they can attack you!
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>>85841 it do be like that
>>85841 FFS heart, a heartbeat how can I be so dumb. That's the catbat's fault they made me smooth
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Aww, you hurted her fee-fees!
>>85842 I'm leaving out milk, cookies, and a dozen roses for the Christmas gote. >>85843 >they made me smooth Beans will do that.
>>85845 She wants gingerbread men to devour and egg nog to wash it down. Egg nog with a TON of booze in it.
>>85846 I can do gingerbread but she shouldn't drink and drive (her sleigh) so she'll have to settle for a thermos full of hot toddy later. I suppose I can leave out some candy canes for her to lick lewdly if she needs something to keep her busy.
>>85847 Don't worry about her! The Whitehorns do most of the driving and you really want her to remember your house. For later. For sex. CHRISTMAS SEX.
>>85848 >For later >I'm not getting BAGGED >The goat who has been having thoughts of love correcting her special someone all year decides to wait EVEN LONGER Christmas Spirit save my pelvis when that love and autism is finally released.
>>85849 Anon, someone has to bring weird NEETs and autistic monster girls their future hubbies. And that someone is the CHRISTMAS GOTE.
>>85850 It's true, the cupid have slacking of late. And let's not even discuss the Easter cunny.
>>85819 ms. mantis will eviscerate me for disturbing the peace of her forest by jumping and down and shrieking for joy, crying and thanking every god and laughing
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Praise the Sabbath on Friday night It's goat sex time!
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>>85853 i wish goats were real
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>>85853 >amazing hips >plentiful ass >that arch Baphos and all Sabbath girls in general are just so perfect and delicious
>Nice of the titania to invite us over for a picnic, gay Anon? >I hope she made lotsa spaghettiny! >ANON, LOOHK! >It's from Drudru! <Dear Pesky Paladins, <The Druellings and I have taken over the fairy kingdom. <The princess is now a permanent femcel in one of my seven gooner hotels. <I dare you to fuck her if you can!
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>>85853 Summer goat sex
>>85858 I would rescue the bapho at the sea
>>85844 how? I haven't anything yet >>85845 >Beans will do that. I hope so, they are the best medecine
>>85856 >gay Anon It's probably one of those fags who always try to ruin the vibe of discussions and start talking about doing everything to avoid ending up with mamono. You know, the ones that would rather think about sucking dicks when they are about to be taken by mamono and Alp on the spot to avoid marriage.
>>85866 You sure think a lot about men, sucking dicks and bashing on other guys' preferences, anon. Almost like a woman.
>>85859 Gote: The chicken of the sea
>>85866 no he is gay it just means happy plz lrn 2 eigo
>>85819 >anon hasn't yet realized that the whole "evil empire" is just an elaborate larp, and malef is absolutely going to have some fun with it before he figures it out
>>85870 I don't care how evil she is, if I'm not playing sports, I don't care about the umpire!
>>85819 I feel like they wouldn't, but it would be hot for some rich/powerful monster(s) to go out of their way to get an isekaid human because they are so strange, exotic and they simply must have it. Dragons, vamps and grapes.
>>85819 I'm not sure how this is supposed to be scary with MGE girls >oh noooooo, I will be taken care of by a benevolent super woman that will either become my perfect wife or help me find my destined soul mate! I AM TERRIFIED! Shit like MGQ would be a whole different story
>>85873 If you got isekaid with no cheats then you wouldn't know that you were in MGE at first.
>>85873 Two scenarios >You don't know what MGE is and so you don't know that >You know what MGE is but you are like anyone else and, after getting suddenly isekaid are probably feeling VERY shocked/stress, you see someone with some crazy body type like an arachne, lamia or god forbid a sandworm, you'd still get freaked out I could believe not having much of a reaction if you knew it was MGE and/or it was like a sheep who found you.
>Isekai event generates some really weird mana in the world >Within 2 minutes of arrival you have at least 14 lilims, 3 baphs and some other extremely powerful guardian monsters teleporting to your location to investigate what the fuck is going on
>>85819 no, i know im going to be found by a dragon, and dragons are cool and ill take any opportunity to hang out with a cool lizard
>>85875 >You don't know what MGE is and so you don't know that It's a good premise for story about someone else, but there's the fun for me if a large chunk of my memories got wiped, is it still really me? >You know what MGE is but you are like anyone else and, after getting suddenly isekaid are probably feeling VERY shocked/stress I dunno, maybe it's because I have nobody on this side that I care about except my dogs, I hope in such scenario time here would freeze but I'd just wait and see how things play out, given that I know MGE is a wish fulfillment utopia and I can't get bad ended. Arachne isn't scary if I know she won't juicebox me and she's only webbing me up for kinky bondage play. Or maybe I cooked my brain with too many monster girls fantasies and replaced natural response of >many legs = BAD with >many legs (+ woman) = VERY VERY VERY GOOD Because I just can't imagine being scared of any MGE monster girl.
>>85878 >I just can't imagine being scared of any MGE monster girl CHALLENGE ACCEPTED You gonna get real, real weird sex requests. Like, what-in-the-what is she asking for and why and I sure hope she isn't serious about the his-in-hers toilets and what's a poopgasm I don't want a poopgasm I don't even want the word poopgasm to exist help help help help help help
I don't care about the truth anymore, I'm taking the blue pill
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>>85881 A wise choice.
>>85877 >Well I can't possibly approve of being called a lizard >But if anon thinks I'm uh... 'cool', then I shall overlook it
>>85876 >portals emit detectable energy, but the monsters aren't sure if earth has the technology to detect it >so they opened a very small portal to earth and sent a pixie through to scout the other side >after studying you closely, miss pixie has made herself known to you and asked for your help in this mission
>>85885 >Miss Pixie is suspiciously chubby and you found her sleeping in your cookie jar
>>85885 >portals still not opened because the scout pixie ended up being one nerd's self-cleaning onahole >not that she minds it
>>85885 What does she need my help for? I'm just one guy. I guess I can give her a headpat with my finger.
>>85887 surely the influx of mana would help her send the all-clear back to base, right?
>>85888 Pixies are too small to buy cookies. She can also make sure you get the soft kind, not those hard-ass bullshit cookies.
>>85891 What does she think of triple chocolate cookies? Red velvet? White chocolate and blueberry? I'm going to feed her SO many cookies.
>>85892 Miss Pixie is a genuine cookie-loving SLUT. For cookies. She'll try anything! Cookie-wise. She's definitely not thinking about sex with you while eating them.
>>85894 >Pixie shrinks anon and has sex in the cookiebox
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even the most pale hebis can't escape from getting delicious tan
>Isekaid directly ontop of a hebi Spawncamping
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>>85897 >Hebi wishes a man would fall into her arms >Wish granted Endless love and devotion begins
>>85898 Hebis get their wishes granted because they are all very good girls
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>>85899 of course they are no one can love like a hebi
There are almost no safe places to be isekaid. If it's a city then you are going to get molested by the authorities, some classy monster or the street gangs. If it's a town, then you are going to get molested by the market vendors, the shopkeepers and the town guard. If it's farmland, then you are going to get cowed, sheeped and browncowed. If it's a forest, then every single beastwoman is going to immediately know where you are, assuming a plant doesn't snare you first. If it's the sea, then you are 'rescued' by a nereid or mershark in minutes. If it's zipangu, then it's the foxes, the kej's, the onis, the hebis and others trying to get you to come home with them. If it's wonderland, then good fucking luck with purple and her gaggle of tea drinking rapists. If it's the undead realms, then you being alive attracts the shambling undead and haughty wights and other ghouls and ghosts. If it's wintertown, then your warmth is forfeit and the yetis close in. If it's the desert kingdom, then you'll be taken by a pharaoh or apophis' minion assuming a sandworm don't get you first. If it's lescatie, then it's SUCC. If it's dragonia then you shall be the object of fascination of a curious wurm.
>>85898 >>85902 >If it's dragonia then you shall be the object of fascination of a curious wurm. Then I must pray to the gods that I am sent to Dragonia so I can be WURMED.
>>85903 What does being WURMED entail? Does she just sort of slither all over you?
>Get Isekai in the malef's court >So stressed and scared that I can't dom her >Malef ultra smug >Too much shame, must jump from the window >Get grabbed by malef mid fall >She's not so smug now Won even if they put me in the special padded chamber
>>85905 >Desmug malef >She's now lovebombing you in your padded cell >It's very nice for a padded cell >Armchair, fireplace, stuffed toys, hot drinks, good food, comfier bed than your old one >Malef and dragon newts constantly going in and out to ask (well, charade/mime cause you can't understand them) if you need anything
>>85902 Nah I believe in fate, big batcat will protect me and become my cat
>>85906 I would call it a good ending and fitting ending
>>85907 I want a titanically big bat cat
>get hit by truck-kun >blast off like Team Rocket >land on something soft >something very, very soft >sink into it Congratulations! Your life was saved by Slime!
>get hit by truck-kun >blast off like Team Rocket >ground approaching fast >hear a rumbling >sandworm leaps from ground and eats you midair Congratulations?
>get hit by truck-kun >blast off like Team Rocket >land in gremtech workshop mid failed experiment >"SHE'S GONNA BLOW!" >? >blast off like Team Rocket >Fuck grem midair when she deploys parachute
>>85912 How long can a man possibly stay airborne using this method?
>>85913 I believe some of the ballistic engineer gremlins call it 'rocket jumping'
>truck-kun dosent hit you <"pew" >... >get tackled by hellhound
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>dragon is overjoyed that her summoning spell finally worked >anon has no idea where he is or why this strange reptile woman is so excited to see him
>>85914 I'm quaking over here
>>85917 You're doomed, anon. Doomed, I tell you.
>>85918 This is unreal
Daikatana
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>>85916 How does human boy summoning work, anyway? Like what do they use to lock in on a target? >>85920 You didn't even make a joke there you heretic
>>85920 I think the <John Romero's About to Make You His Bitch marketing slogan would work A LOT better with mamono
>Grem hits you with her realm silver market gardener >Instant incubise
<BEWARE, I LIVE
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>>85924 COWARD I HUNGER
>>85924 >>85925 Finally, an aggressive yandroid.
>>85921 The whole game's a fucking joke.
>>85926 Androids are robots modeled after male appearance, womanlike bots are called gynoids.
>>85902 >If it's farmland, then you are going to get cowed, sheeped and browncowed. but where is the shepherd kobold? wheres the werewolf in sheep's clothing that would do anything if it meant i dont tell secrets to the rest of the flock (they know but they're polite to not bring it up)? where is the gremlin who only comes out of the garage once a year in harvest season with her newly upgraded tractor?
>>85928 I'mma need a dedicated pun mamono to tell me the pun wasn't worth it, not some random Anon.
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navs drawing baphos again
>>85906 Need post-isekai language teacher learncow. Come to think, I'd actually have something to teach her in that case, assuming the touch magic didn't work quite right for whatever reason. Sounds like a nice way to bond. >HFW you use your new skill to write a barely coherent (to anyone else, she knows how you think so she mostly gets it) but heartfelt love letter
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how are nyou doing on this fine day of catur?
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>>85931 Good, now I hope he goes bacl to pear shaped lolis and the brown Bapho hag
>>85933 >dating a monster girl but she keeps stopping to read a phrase book that you're not sure is entirely accurate
>>85935 the bapho in that pic is the only good bapho!
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>>85939 May a thousand angry baphos tap dance on your roof each night.
>>85845 >She drinks the milk and eats the cookies as well as the roses At least her breath will smell nice.
>>85940 I would sue for the damage they caused to my rooftiles! maybe i could get a full roofrestoration out of it!
>>85942 Anon, you know loli demonic lawyers will tie you up in torts for years! The only reason you'd do something like that is a secret lust for loli OLs.
>>85942 Baphs are too light and light on their feet to damage anything. Plus, if the time those goose harpies terrorized Canada by honking at all hours of the night is any indication, the wildlife will be left to do as it pleases anyway.
>>85943 My plan is to get a danuki that has an issue/beef with the sabbath just to set up a precedent >>85944 Baphs are sentient and not wildlife ergo they are responsible for their own action
>>85945 You know the poem about the old woman who swallowed the fly? You are headed RIGHT DOWN THAT PATH
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Still cold Hebis require husbands warm embrace
>>85946 why would a woman swallow an abbadonfolk? (i dont know the poem tbh)
>Monster Girl Encyclopedia? >Nah, this is the Monster GRILL encyclopedia >It's a restaurant not a book, though we definitely wrote the book on grilling >Don't get many single guys coming in here (at least not without a rape wish) >We got red meat, white meat, realm beast meat, fried meat, grilled meat, seafood, roast meat, and seafood with meat. >Hope you got a large appetite, cause our portions are made for our ravenous, carnivorous clientelle >Can be hard to adjust to urban life when your species' diet is meat meat and more meat >Find yourself a seat and we'll be right over, or go up to the all you can eat. >Just watch you don't end up as dessert for one of the regulars
>>85951 I will order fishos to attract cats
>>85951 What would be the difference between fried and roasted meat? I wish to study this distinction further
>>85953 >Doesn't understand difference between roasting and frying This Anon needs to be Kiki'd IMMEDIATELY
>Anon once again fails to read the room >In his defense, he can't read anything, let alone a room. >>85954 No, this one needs a hound or salamander.
>>85952 I heard that fish and chips summon chesho
>>85956 I would love the Chesho most of all kots, but I worry that I do not deserve a Chesho.
>>85951 they will wrap anything in bacon
>>85957 Same, we can only try do better
>>85959 Crispy
>>85958 They wrapped an entire onion in bacon. AN ONION.
>>85963 You stuff hotdogs with onions so why not bacon
>>85963 OK, that actually sounds awesome.
>Go to grill >Get bacon >Beeg monster saddles up near you >"You like bacon as well? No way!"
>>85967 My heart would go pitter-patter, especially if beeg monster if floofy
If I can't eat the meat off the girl's tummy/tits/butt then is it really a grill? ...I hope that is some form of fire elemental magic, where I can have sizzled bacon of a horc or ogre's abs
>>85967 Fate
>>85963 Sounds good, me love onions
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on this weeks episode of large monsters and small humans:
>>85967 Can a Manticore make grilled cheese?
>>85974 Manticores cannot because their IRRESISTABLE CHEESE LUST prevents them from getting to the cooking part.
>>85973 Technically this is big monster, small human, smaller monster
>>85974 A coreq madame
>>85948 Abbies aren't flies, they're locusts.


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